Is this what I want?

[ZombiePringle]

I thought I was strong. Tried to be strong. I'm failing...I'm giving way to my thoughts. Everyday I fall deeper into this freakin pit of despair. Why am I here? I'm doing nothing but causing others pain . I feel its getting closer to my time. July...I'm giving it until July.

 

[Bambi]

Hi, I have seen some of your posts and you do make a difference!
I am glad to hear that you are willing to give a bit of time.
If your up for talking you can PM or IM me, happy to listen, help you with ideas to make things better before July or whatever you would like..hope to hear from you soon and to see you in July!

 

[Samsara]

Hey I talked to you in chat tonite Remember what I told you, and let me know of your progress ::hugs::

 

[fromthatshow]

Who are you causing pain?
I'm guessing people in your life are making you feel that way. The truth is that other people's pain is never your fault. No matter what the situation.
And when it comes to this forum, you are definitely not causing anyone pain here at least and we want you here :hug:

 

[Remedy]

You are strong! You don't fail until you give up trying... We've talked a bit, you're not the one to blame. Hang in there let us support you.
Always here if you want to chat. :hug:

 

[ZombiePringle]

I'm just giving up. calling it quits. I seriously have become too weak to fight it anymore tried last sunday I'm going to try again really soon. and hopefully succeed this time.

 

[Petal]

Hi Josh

Please don't give up. :sad: You're not to weak...

If you're going through hell,keep going

winston churchill

 

[ZombiePringle]

I have to today.

 

[Petal]

why do you have to,today?!

 

[ZombiePringle]

I have to. I'm sorry. I'm ready. Just waiting for my daughter to wake up so I can give her one last kiss.

 

[Bambi]

Kankura what is going on? Please talk to us or someone, surely there is hope! Think of your daughter,, she can't do without you.
Please talk to us, call suicide prevention,.somebody..please don't do this to you..
B

 

[Bambi]

Wondering if your okay? Sure wish you'd talk to us and let us comfort you...It does get better...

 

[ZombiePringle]

it hasn't gotten better. only worse. I did try yesterday. going to try again today. I can't do this.

 

[WildCherry]

What's going on, what's causing you to feel this way?
PLEASE come back and let us try to help.

 

[ZombiePringle]

putting myself in the psych ward. I'll be back ASAP

 

[yursomedicated]

Kank... please let me know when you get home.

I miss talking to you in chat already.

 

[WildCherry]

I really hope they help you, and you start to feel better soon!!

 

[ZombiePringle]

Its um only gotten worse. I finally went back to work after being away over 2 weeks. first day back went okay. today is another story. The night started out okay. until one of the employees messed up a machine while I was busy doing something else. The other supervisor jumped all over me. told me I should have been paying attention to him. then told me I'm the one that messed up since i wasn't watching him. he said other stuff too. I completely lost it. went into the bathroom into one of the stalls and just started attacking myself. My work always stresses me out. I've been in bad enough shape before even coming back. I shouldn't have come back yet. I'm so emotionally messed up that I guess this just made me go back to wanting to end it. I think this time I'm days away from doing it. I just can't do it anymore. everyday I struggle. everyday I get more and more intense suicidal feelings.

 

[total eclipse]

hey your work place needs to be more compassionate. It is not you it is them. I know the stress of work it can make you feel so low i wish people would understand and not be so critical. Please think of your daughter she is going to suffer so much if you leave. My daughter is the only thing that keeps me here. I would never want her to suffer like me with deep depression. She and your daughter need our protection and our love we are the only ones who can show them how to stay strong. Please try a new medication talk with your doctor but don't give up. Your daughter needs you and will suffer greatly without you. Take care please do not let others take away your life. You are better than them.

 

[ZombiePringle]

she's the only one keeping me here. Even that is starting to not work. everybody around me is being extremely unsupportive. my fiance even told me that she was sick of dealing with how depressed I am and should focus on her. I have no friends where I live and the rest of my family is 10 hours away.