I’m so alone I see little point in living is the main issue. I try so hard to “find” my fit, find my tribe but I don’t belong. I never have. 3 times now I’ve tried to lull myself - they locked me last time to teach me a lesson. That place was horrendous, how that helps anyone I’ll never know.
I have everything many people want but I also have nothing that other people have. Covid isn’t helping obviously. I just think it’s pointless and all I’m doing is dragging things out. I’m old and worthless.
maybe my expectations of life are wrong but I can feel death crawling closer, that feeling of darkness. I start to think about it, wonder, relight the plans.
answers and what’s the purpose