it isnt enough anymore

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by justmeonlyme, Mar 23, 2010.

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  1. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    so ummm im not exsactly sure how to word this but i will do my best well yesterday i was feeling really triggered then i went on to chat and someone said something that triggered me even more i ended up cutting but it didnt help this isnt the first time it hasnt helped the last few times ive done it it hasnt been enough i feel like i need to do more but yet i cant idk if its like this for anyone else but like its like ive gotten to a point where its not enough i need more but that really scares me like what if i do something without thinking what will i do im scared of myself some people say there the only person they can trust i cant trust anyone not even myself. im so scared idk what to do please dont tell me to go see a professional i already see a cansalar and she doesnt help dont tell me to get a diffrent one coz shes the only one i can see for free and we cant afford to pay for a diffrent one. i dont even no why im making this post no one will take any notice im just some stuped teen who needs to get over herself anyone who has taken the time to read this im sorry for taking up your time.
     
  2. 41021

    41021 Banned Member

    I'm too messed up to be helpful.
    But I've got hugs ****HUGS**** :hug: :hug:
     
  3. betteroffunknown

    betteroffunknown Well-Known Member

    hang in there hon. hang in there. keep talking with your therapist. i know you don't feel that it's helping. i felt that way myself for years, but eventually i realized it really did help. oh i may have had to repeat myself a hundred times about something but eventually i got it out of my system. i didn't realize it right away but i did eventually. i know people get tired of trying. this is the norm for this stuff, but i would like to encourage you to take some of the energy that you invest, and time that you invest in putting it into the sh stuff and continue to talk with us and/or your therapist. it can and will make a difference.

    please take care and hang in there. we're here for ya. i look forward to talking with ya soon. take care
     
  4. cookiemonster

    cookiemonster Banned Member

    :hug: emma, just keep talking. hopefully things will get better and you wont even need to cut anymore. if you want, you can talk to me. i seem to be on here most of the time now anyway. just pm me anytime :hug: and take care of yourself
     
  5. ballinluig

    ballinluig Well-Known Member

    hi emma, its so hard i know. i used to s/h and had to cut, the feelings of release was so great only another person who does this would understand what im saying. It will pass emma, it just takes time babe. it does sound hard but keep going to your therapist, it may seem useless now but it does help but because your mind is so messed up you wont realise it.
    pm me if you want chat. know im new on here but have suffered from depression for 15 years..... dx:hugtackles:
     
  6. RedTears

    RedTears Well-Known Member

    yeah, it's gotten that way for me too. Cutting doesn't always work for me anymore. That's why i resorted to suicide attempts, i guess.
     
  7. Pebble

    Pebble Well-Known Member

    Hi Emma sending big hugs :hug: I know how it can feel sometimes, I've self harmed for the last 9 years, but some of those years have been better than others. Has your counsellor talked to you about any other ways of release? I know some if not all of these wont always work for you but as long as you are aware of them, you can at least give them a go first even if its just to prolong the act of sh. Talking to a therapist is never easy but sometimes it takes a while to build that sense of trust with them and that patient-therapist relationship, try to give it time to work for you but keep talking as this will be the best thing to help you. Sorry if I've not made much sense, just want you to know that I understand what your saying and can relate to it, if you ever want to talk (sometimes its easier to talk to people who have been in or are in similar situation) then please PM me. I'm usually on here in the evenings. I hope your ok x
     
  8. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    thanks guys idk i guess im just going to have to keep going ill be fine idk just having a hard time.
     
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