My life has been crap since I was in 7th grade, that is 6 years. There has always been too much pressure on me, to perform in studies, kids looking down on me. I worked very hard for the last two years, VERY VERY hard, just to get into a college in the US, across the world from my parents and everyone else in my life. I expected to start afresh, start a new life. I thought maybe I had taken enough shit and now I'll be able to at least enjoy myself in an awesome college. Everything went right, very right. I got lucky, got and immense scholarship( I was among the only 4 international kids who were given a scholarship). I asked my dad for the ridiculously low amount of fee the college wanted. He told me he didn't save any money in his ENTIRE LIFE. Now he put me into a CRAP college here close to our home, and I won't even be living there in a hostel, but going by a bus from my house, as if I am in fucking school. I worked sooooooooo hard man...............Now my dad says he will remove the internet connection as it ruins my grades. I am fucking 18 and he wants to control me like a fucking kid. I can't remember the last time I was genuinely happy, without any tension, since I was 11. I can't take 4 more years of shit man...... I just can't . I mean I worked so damn hard, made miracles happen, in the hope of escaping my overbearing parents, and it was all for nothing. The fucking college starts in 2 days, and I just don't want it. I promised myself I will kill myself if something like this happened. Now I don't know man, I just love myself too much and don't want to go.... But I can't take this shit man.........just can't. I don't know what to do. I have still not quit, and am applying for student loan, but my father's credit is so bad that no bank is prepared to give. Still, I won't quit. Its not over till its over.