I find myself in quite a trouble. I have had Paranoid schizophrenia for 10 years. I'm partially Medicated, but still troubled. The anxiety is driving me mad. And I have problems sleeping. I have developed a strong hate against the police, because I think they are placing curses on me, and surveillancing me 24/7. I honestly don't know my own state anymore mentally. I have trouble expressing myself. I pray now all day long, but to no help. God must really hate me. The future is dark and shallow. I live because of my family, but my troubles are draining them. I'm afraid I will go to prison because of the paranoia, I pray to God I don't do anything stupid.