I really want to do it right now. god to just take all those pills and die. not have to think, breathe or live ever again. just be dead. people keep saying pills are the worse way to kill yourself, but that's not true. There are people who've actually done it with pills. I'm a pretty small person. I could probably take about 50 and be done with it. If only I had the balls. I'm so fucking weak. What the hell is there left for me. just a lonely life full of misery and burden. im worthless to everyone. The only person who needs me in this life is my mom. is it worth it anymore, staying alive for her. maybe i should take her with me. put us both out of our misery. i'm so fucking alone. i can't do this anymore.