it's been 6 months

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Beka, Feb 28, 2012.

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  1. Beka

    Beka Well-Known Member

    It's been 6 months.

    I am a failure, apparently I lie to myself too cause I promised myself I would never ever go back to sh. I can't help it, it's nagging at the back of my mind. It feels too right to stop?
    I have never been a massive fan of talking to professionals, but I really do want to stop relying on it. It's getting worse, whereas I used to think of the consequences if people found out, I now don't care.
    I know it really isn't right to want to do it, and not care about anything else, I don't want it to swallow me up again. My life does not revolve around it anymore and talking to people is a last resort for me. What can I do?
  2. Anju

    Anju Well-Known Member

    I am pretty sure that there is a sticky somewhere with techniques on how to cope when you feel the urge. You know, pinging an elastic band on your wrist, putting your arm in a bucket of ice, drawing on yourself with sharpie/food dye etc. Have you tried any of these? Or even just typing a lot of random posts on here as a form of distraction to get you through the moment?
    You are certainly not a failure for relapsing. You have made a major breakthrough in stopping at all, never mind for 6 months!
    All you can do is try to get through it any way you can. Self harm is in itself a coping mechanism, so it's hard to replace it with another one. Really hard. But if you were able to do it once before, draw upon that strength to do it again. How did you stop in the first place? Do you think you could use that same technique again?
    You are aware that what you're doing is counter productive, and that's good. Don't beat yourself up because you slipped up and did it again, just think to yourself 'right, ok. I did it. But I don't have to do it again.' It doesn't have to control you <3
  3. Deadtwice

    Deadtwice Well-Known Member

    By no means are you a failure. Six months is great. The longest i have gone in seven years is two months. Six months is exceptional. Now from my experience there are two ways to deal with relapse. First is to allow minor injury on ienervals that becom farther and farther apart or try to quit strait again. That is my knowledge. If you need to talk pm me it is the best from of distraction to talk to someone.
  4. MuchLove4God

    MuchLove4God Member

    Hi there! Lets think for a minute what you are trying to achieve... stopping cutting. And you did that!! Every single day during those 6 months was a day you kept yourself from being injured. That is a huge success! I felt like you are feeling- until I had that realization. Progress not perfection. Maybe something is triggering you? Maybe something inside that you thought was resolved needs a little more attention? Maybe something in your enviroment has changed recently and is triggering you. For me... injuring was an illusion of help. I know what you mean about it feeling right. (like with alcohol or drugs) it worked to kill the pain. But it began taking more and more cutting to achieve the relief. Then it began taking more and more severe cutting. (just like with my drug and alcohol addiction) For me- One is too many. And a thousand never enough. Hang on and stay strong. Do not let yourself be condemned. That fact that you are trying is to be applauded! And you have found 6 months worth of success. Try and keep the faith that this will end. Your friend, Angel
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You are winning hun so what if you slip up you go back and keep fighting okay you can stop you know that now so don't let any slip up change what you have accomplished hugs to you
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