It's been a rocky year for me, and its getting to the point that it's too much..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by klryan89, Oct 29, 2011.

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  1. klryan89

    klryan89 New Member

    My GP was awful when I first went to see her about my problems. It took about 4 months for me to finally be referred to see a psychiatrist. I was disgnosed with BPD but was discharged soon after, refused treatment as my issues were not 'serious enough'.
    I spend three years studying extremely hard, for nothing.
    I can't get a job, no one wants me, I'm turning all those that care about me away from me because I keep thinking they don't care.
    I can't sleep at night, I'm being rude to just about everyone without wanting to and I just want someone to be there for my 24/7.
    Things aren't that simple though and I have always had an extreme fear of abandonment. Every day I keep thinking that my boyfriend will leave me in some way and I will be all alone. It's affecting my ability to even carry out day-to-day activities. He's ten years older than me and because of that I keep thinking that he will leave me here alone one day.
    I don't know what to do to stop feeling like this.
    Does anyone who understands what I've just wrote have any ideas?
     
  2. Severijn

    Severijn Well-Known Member

    Hi klryan89, sorry to hear you are in a tough spot.

    You said that 'they' said your problems were not serious enough, but they sure sound serious to me! If you have BPD, you can get treatment for this, and improve the quality of your life. Getting treatment when you have BPD is difficult, but you already said you have a light form, so who knows maybe it's very well treatable. I think you should give it a shot.

    You said 'refused' treatment: Did you refuse or the doctors refuse?

    Btw, I don't have BPD, but have struggled with social anxiety disorder, PTSD, and clinical depression for many years, so I know what it's like to be in a difficult spot. Take care! And I hope this helps a bit.
     
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