It's been about four months...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by CJKitti_85, Feb 21, 2013.

  1. CJKitti_85

    CJKitti_85 Member

    ...since he used me and spat in my face, ripped my heart out and elevated himself to god status. I wish I could get over him and how he cheated. I wish I had NEVER met this guy or did anything with him over Skype. Or sent him stuff or had his back the entire time. Mostly I wish I could quell the desire for revenge. Sometimes it gets so bad I think about because they're not that far from my neighborhood. :grey:
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 21, 2013
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    It has taken me so many years to learn the message, that, although I feel like hurting those who hurt me (I used to recite in my head what I wanted to do to those people), the best use of my energy is to improve myself...I have had someone do this to me and what I took away was some ways in which to identify someone who would do this to me in the future...I understand your rage...I have felt it, but know you are so much more valuable than this person treated you and that these are his problems
  3. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    I second that, totally! You CAN come out of this experience the wiser, and therefore the better person than you were before it happened. In this way, you are using what he gave you to become the better person - it might take some time and some work for your feelings to heal, but when you have the motive to get over it, that's the main ingredient necessary.

    If the motive for getting over it isn't with you right now, ask yourself why that is, and it will help you to get to know yourself better. Self-awareness is always a good thing, so either way, you're a winner in this hun!

    It will also have taught you something about 'caution' for the future, and about what you are looking for as regards 'trust'. So, in these ways, the energy associated with the feelings of revenge can be re-directed :)
  4. CJKitti_85

    CJKitti_85 Member

    Thank you. I'm slowly trying to work myself out of the thoughts that most of it was my fault. I still struggle with anger and guilt... one of the worst things he said to me was "Stop trying to control me!" I wasn't trying to... I just wanted him to reflect on why all his relations fall apart and why he gets pushed out of group projects. But I guess I can't tell him anything because it would be controlling him. I'd give more info, but it's a REALLY long story.