Its either cutting or........

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Suicidal_Dragon, Mar 15, 2007.

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  1. Suicidal_Dragon

    Suicidal_Dragon Active Member

    I am losing it. It is either i cut myself or i commit suicide. FOR NOW i am just cutting. Nothing to serious right?

    I have cut myself before. My school teachers saw them and sent me to the councelor. I told them what happened...that...i did cut myself. He didnt take me seriously. I even told the nurse when she asked what happened. At that time, 2 years ago, I had just simply snapped and cut myself.

    They counted them and I had a total of 45 cuts on my arms.

    Now i find myself doing it more often. It seems to be the only way i can end the pain. Squizing ice, and snapping rubber bands against my wrists dont work. I am and have been, i guess you can say "immune" to those things.
     
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Those two things, suicide or SI, might seem like your only options, but that is not true.

    The other option is to get help. I understand that you previously had a bad experience with getting help, but that does not mean you will next time. You could try your doctor, or another school counsellor. Going to the doctor will open more up to you, like meds, therapy, etc.

    Ideally, you need to deal with the root cause for your cutting and feeling so bad at the moment.

    In the short term, when you need to cut, you could try things like painting, exercise, writing, drawing, singing. If you are thinking about finding other ways to deal with your pain (or even just delay your SI for a bit) then maybe try and think about what is making you want to harm, ie what emotion, and find another way to release that emotion (like if its anger, try scribbling all over a piece of paper, or smushing up a banana). You could also try making spider diagrams before you cut, with you in the middle, and all around the edge the different things you are thinking and feeling at that moment.

    It sounds like you don't necessarily want to be harming yourself (hence the mentioning of the elastic bands and ice), but yet you don't quite know what else to do.

    I seriously hope you consider getting help.

    I also wanted to ask, what 'pain' are you trying to end by harming? And how do you think it help?
     
  3. scared_child

    scared_child Account Closed

    i agree with scum, one bad experience with trying to get help, doesnt mean that you still cant get the help. I would definitly recommend working out until you nearly pass out from exahausion. it works*smiles* good luck
     
  4. Suicidal_Dragon

    Suicidal_Dragon Active Member

    Not trying to be completely negative or turn down any of the advice you have given, cause i appreciate it but there are some problems with what was given...
    The only way I could get to the doctors is by telling my mom. She would still think i am just trying to fit in. She just doesnt understand. I have tried telling her i need help.
    I cant go to another counsellor. They assign us one counsellor. The school doesn't allow us to go to other counsellors.
    I really thank you two for the help, I will give some of it a try. Dont know how well i will work though......
     
  5. Anastacia007

    Anastacia007 Member

    May not seem serious now, but just wait until you get to the point that I'm at now. You may cut now for relief, but after awhile, it becomes addictive, and you cut when your happy. I can't reverse where I'm at now, this addiction, but you can.
     
  6. deep

    deep Well-Known Member

    Cutting

    I have been cutting myself for 10yrs and it seems the only answer I have a beautiful family and parents that love me but its still not enough and I feel selfish about it but its my only releaf to the things going on inside my head :sad: :sad:
     
  7. LaLaLullaby

    LaLaLullaby Well-Known Member

    Do you know anyone that's had therapists and such in your area?
    Might be able to ask them for advice.
    Try and weed out like a makeshift background check.
     
  8. Suicidal_Dragon

    Suicidal_Dragon Active Member

    ................... I now have more cuts..........
    Not on purpose, I cant settle my mind for even a moment...
    Dare not count how many I have....
    Also.... I ended up cutting my wrists... Not very deep though... dont know whether to call it suicide attempts or cutting.... 3 times I did it.... both wrists...
     
  9. Suicidal_Dragon

    Suicidal_Dragon Active Member

    the cuts on my wrists are a little over 12 hours old....
     
  10. Charlie<3

    Charlie<3 Member

    i can totally understand..instead of trying to kill myslef agian i burn myself and i know hurting yourself is positive but I alteast i am alive. so i can undertand you
     
  11. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    i agree. at leat we are alive either we cut, burn stick sharp things into us e are alive right.
     
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