I moved into this apartment with 3 great friends, ones I'd known since middle school/high school and for the first couple months everything was going great. I mean, great in that aspect. My life is pretty shitty. I'm smart, I understand too much and desire too little in life. The only thing keeping me going was their friendship the hoping for the light at the end of the tunnel working shitty jobs failing to get work with this crappy degree I have. I haven't tried to make new friends in many years and I have no desire to. I really dislike people for the most part and spend the majority of my nights by myself. Now I feel alone on this earth. No soulmate, no passion, no desire. I've been trying to write good music for 12 years now and utterly failing in all aspects. Everything that was once good is now shit. I simply put up with life for the sake of putting up with life. Laziness, if you will. It's just too easy to get caught into this abhorrent routine of awfulness just to make rent at the end of the month. It sucks and I will not be on this earth much longer as I see it.