Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by LetItGo, Oct 20, 2008.
When you finally realize absolutely nothing matters.
I draw on my suicidal thoughts to push past phobias or anxiety. I will remind myself "well if you are going to kill yourself anyway.... how much worse can doing X be?". That helps me knowing nothing can ever be 'THAT' important and I feel it is liberating in that sense.
At the same time though, the knowledge of how meaningless everything is, of itself, is often a crushing source of depression and apathy. I don't know.
i agree totally. now that i have planned out my perfect suicide. i feel so much more comfortable living life...or 'living' to some extent....and unlike most of my 'friends'...im not scared of 'creepy' people or scary dogs....because i dont care if they kill me.....except that i wont get to do it myself.....
what happened to K, and working on sites, your mom, etc. What happened to the things you wanted tod o hun?
Yes I agree.
When you free yourself from the world.
Everything loses value.
Matt I'm seeing a downward spiral here...we've all been here done that...YOU moved on..so talk, you have both me and Kells msns, skype and googletalk addies.
It is. When you lose everything, then you've got nothing to lose.
I've been there lots of times and come up for air, so to speak but I was there a year ago and it's made me live better.
Makes one wonder just how far you can take "Be in the world, but not of it".
It SEEMS sensible enough - but try to explain and rationalize it to someone...
Its so hard to describe how I feel, been thinking about this for the last 48 hours.
I love K, very much, things are really good between us, so much so were talking about "the marriage" thing again
I love working on my sites, ive done more work on them in the last 2 to 3 weeks than ive done in months, its still incredibly slow mind you. I just dont have the money right now too make it more efficient. ie outsource stuff.
I love my mum as well, wish she was closer and all, wish Dad was closer for that matter as well.
But despite all that, its meaningless. Its the world around me, nothing has any meaning or respect, nothing is important, everything comes and goes so quickly, floods, war, famine, technology, disease...its on the news for 5 minutes, and then its gone, replaced by the next drama, nothing is "significant" "defining"...takes any sort of precedence, you know what im sayin? Maybe people are right, now that so many of us dont believe in god, the "all powerful"...we wander around looking for something to fill that role, something to respect, to serve, to hold us together, and we cant find it, cause it doesnt exist. What are we genuinely working towards as a species apart from a slow, grinding poisoning of the planet and our eventual extinction as a result?
I dunno, like I said, nothing really matters.
Matts I have an idea..will send you email :hug:
I agree with what MJ is saying. The world is a transitory place as it is forever changing. I've realized that long ago.
Maybe you've been in it- (it being the fast news, the "drama" being fed to you on television) so long you've been desensitised to all those things.
What would be significant and defining to you? What would you like to hear on the news that would make life more meaningful?
Personally, I don't think people search the news for meaning in their life- although like you point out- a lot of people live within it- their lives are pretty much taken up with it all- that constant whirlwind of information and what you are, how you should feel, being thrown at you.
I agree that lots of people are always searching without even knowing it, because we're pretty much told we're empty and we're devoid without ABC all the time. I just think there's so much crap out there saying they are God (not literally but y'know..) and they are the truth and they are this/that/the other....and maybe some people do get meaning, even if it's fleeting- out of that? Who knows. Really, who knows...:dry:.
Yeah it's always changing, but it's always the same too. It's the same old whirlwind going on and on.
Suppose if you pick each story out and concentrate on that, it becomes more meaningful, rather than part of the ongoing whirlwind?
When I got a cat, my grandmother said "What's so important about a cat, our street's full of cats, they're a pain, a cat's just a cat."
But my cat's important, because I want to make her important, she's not like all the other cats, she's a special cat.
Who's right? I know my cat isn't special but I choose to make her important. I think nothing is important, I think everything is meaningless, however, I choose to make things important, because I need to in order to survive. Is that wrong?