It's like having a new scar.

Lonz

Active Member
#1
I'd never lost a close friend before. It hurts, and I feel guilty for not having done more. These are all new feelings, and I sure don't like them!

There's no escape, either. I could kill myself, but that would be stupid, because I'd then be guilty of all I condemn my friend for, plus, -I- would then be the one inflicting pain on friends and family. So, I'm stuck with it. It's like a big scar. It is literally a damn scar. Can't turn back time; can't escape it.

Lonz
 

kath

Well-Known Member
#2
Hi.i dont think im gonna be any use to you really.i just wanted you to know i heard and read your pain.i personally [very thankfully] never lost anyone close to me to suicide.ive only ever known of people who have ended up commiting suicide or have had very distant relationships with such people.Sorry that wasnt explained very well but what im trying to say is i knew of their exsistance or i had very very distant relationships with them but even their deaths effected me so much adn i barely knew these people so i dont know what you must be going through.It must be so overwhelming and i am thinking of you and am here if ever you need to talk.im sorry i feel inadequate.Please dont criticise any feelings you experience though.Just let them be and pass.They are probably natural for people to feel in your sitatuion eg the worry that if youd managed to do something else maybe things would be different.Please realise that feelings such as that one though may be natural for you to feel after such an experience but that logically it doesnt make sense as there is no way you can physcially control anyone elses actions.You jsut cant and its important to keep telling yourself that.....or to let us keep telling you.Sorry im gonna shut up.i didnt put that very well.im here if you need me.Please keep posting and im sorry for your loss.
 

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