If it wasnt for me you wouldnt be here right now, and that would mean this situation could have been avoided. We took a step back at one point, and I should have had the balls to make sure that situation was permanent. Should have told you not to come up here, but I took the easy option...pathetic. Irrational and rushed, is how I would describe this move, and since I didnt think it through, she has had to pay the ultimate price. I dont know how I feel about it, just numb. I dont cry these days about anything, ever, so it doesnt surprise me that I havent. I should never have made this an option for you. You could have taken your time and moved when it suited you, and her, but I just rushed it cause I was so fed up. I should have gone on my own...I know that now, but its too late...its all too late. I will promise this though. I will try to make up for it, although it can never be done. I also know what goes around, comes around, and I fully expect to pay a price for my lack of foresight and selfishness. I have a feeling im going to pay very dearly for it, and so be it. I deserve whatever I get.