The past couple of weeks have been so bad. my self harm is out of control. it's mostly cutting and taking overdoses. but it's several times a day, every day. I've seen a self harm worker and while she was really nice and helpful nothing seems to be working. I try distracting myself with all sorts but it doesn't help. the weird thing is I want to hurt myself. I know it's not the way to deal with things but I hate myself so much I just want to cause as much damage to myself as possible. although i don't do it as a suicide attempt, deep down i hope and pray that one day i will kill myself in the process.