I can't do this anymore. I can't pretend that I"m even happy, i can't pretend to smile, i can't even pretend that i want to be here. I'm tired fo fighting, tired of expressing my feelings only to basically take fault for others actions because of my feelings. I want to die, i want to disappear, i want to fade away. It's so easy to do, all these people in this hous and not a soul would eveen notice me gone. It's sad huh, well not really, I'm alone in my mind anyways> I'm nothing and I'm better off making this decision. I have the whole week off of work...i dont want help anymore...i just want to go.