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Its so sad

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by citygirl, Sep 5, 2007.

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  1. citygirl

    citygirl Member

    Today, well yesterday on my lunch break, I was so sad and so miserable. I called 5 people no one answered. Then I called the suicide hotline. All I did was cry. I am not ashamed to admit, I was ready to sit by the side of the road and wait for a semi to come speeding down the interstate to pull out in front of them. Unfortunately for me, the suicide hotline traced my number, but the funny thing about it is my number is an out of state number so they went to my old address and my former employer. Then somewhere along the way, police officers showed up to my employer in the new state where I live now. In patient facilities are a joke, you are gonna "protect" me from myself for 3 days then send back to the same stimuli that got me here, what is the purpose of the "Baker Act" but then again, I don't live in FL anymore so god in heaven knows what the "commonwealth" laws are. It so sad, they contacted my brother back home and he called me, but when I got off work I went straight to the vodka and cranberry. God help me, I just don't want to see another day.
  2. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    It's terrible isn't it!
    Just proves how little the governemnt services actually care.
    We scream out for help, but no one comes running or cares, its bullshit!
  3. JustWatchMeChange

    JustWatchMeChange Well-Known Member

    I am so sorry for what you are going through. I'm crying as I type. I have no answer. I feel like I am right behind you. But I will fight. One thing I learned the hard way is that Vodka is never the answer and it is a cruel master. You never stop needing more. I know, when the pain is bad enough we want anything to help, but does Vodka really help?
  4. KavithaB

    KavithaB Member

    Vodka doesn't help, neither does calling a suicide line. I conclude this after reading a post. Why should they inform police? They must have sent a volunteer to listen to your agony and offer you some comfort.

    I am soooo sorry for you. You must be feeling very bad is it not? Never call the suicide line. Never go to vodka. Talk to someone who can listen like me, maybe, if you want to. It may help if you speak to someone. I don't really know but sometime some of my friends vet their issues to me and say that now they feel better. Maybe it helps to speak. However I can never really get to speak. :sad:

    I wish you good luck to live and pm me if ever you need me.
  5. citygirl

    citygirl Member

    Well, if they sent a "volunteer" to comfort me at my job then I didn't know "volunteers" could be dressed as cops carrying weapons in the middle of the day, but hey what do I know. And exactly who the hell am I supposed to talk to exactly? I reached out, no one was there. I live all alone in a state where I know no one. If wasn't feeling bad I wouldn't be on this board or pouring my heart out and someone telling me a "volunteer" came to give me comfort, wow, that is almost as insulting to me as people telling me to pray about it.

    I have called every doc in my network to see a therapist and every last one, I am sorry I am not seeing no patience. How am I suppose to get help when I reach out and no one is "accepting new patients"
  6. citygirl

    citygirl Member

    It doesn't it just numbs the pain, for a little while anyway.
  7. KavithaB

    KavithaB Member

    I didn't mean to insult you. I too stay alone and I am also depressed most of the time. I am soooo sorry.
  8. Cestmoi

    Cestmoi Well-Known Member

    Ops that was meant to be a pm
  9. mcglothern

    mcglothern New Member

    what a crapy response.
    what exactly were they going to do? stick you in a hospital for a week, how does that make life seem any more appealing.
    Even though i would say you jumped the gun on wanting suicide, or if it was just another ounce of water going into the already unbearable bucket for suicide, i dont know. I hope you find that light in your life, the one thing that makes you happy, the one thing to fight for. :sad:
  10. JustWatchMeChange

    JustWatchMeChange Well-Known Member

    Check with your insurance. I believe that if there are no docs accepting new patients in network most insurances will allow you to see an out of network doctor. The copay might be a little more though.
  11. citygirl

    citygirl Member

    No need for apologies, I was just expressing my feelings.
  12. Sometimes that's all there is....

    I take the same route - I call it slow suicide (and I have a network of support that is not helping). I hear your pain, for what it's worth (sob)

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