...first, to come to the decision that taking one's life is really the right - the only - thing to do. Then, to actually do it - take the massive overdose and wait to die. It was a very conscious, clear-headed decision, and had been in the planning process for months. Then - for some reason I'll never understand - reaching out for help. I have amazing people in my life who are gentle and kind and so supportive. Never judged me, just made sure I was going to be OK. I won't bore you with my story, only to say that it (taking my life) seemed like the only alternative. And it's not over yet. Nothing is resolved, no great insight has been gained, my life is still shattered (and getting worse every day). How do you find the strength to hold on when the future is so abysmally bleak?