There's so much to hate. So much that makes me fuming angry. Every day I see something that rips me away from the idea that this hell circus is worth being a part of. But I hardly get any proof of the contrary. I've been given less reasons to want to be alive than I have been given reasons to do my taxes for fuck's sake. Oh but I'm supposed to come up with those on my own right? The idea that they've been unnoticeable my entire life has to be a fault of my own. Otherwise people might actually have to play with the idea that life's a waste of time, and we can't have that.
If coming up with a reason to stick around either requires decades of hard thought and struggle or lying to yourself, then that to me is the perfect argument as to why this might not be worth it all. Holy fuck I'm sick of it all!
But that's the worst part isn't it? I don't get to decide if I'm sick and done. Because that would be 'selfish.' Emotionally guilting a person into being alive? totally okay. Killing yourself to spare the pain of waking up for the rest of your life? The most selfish act you can perform. Gods damnit I hate being a human so fucking much!
If coming up with a reason to stick around either requires decades of hard thought and struggle or lying to yourself, then that to me is the perfect argument as to why this might not be worth it all. Holy fuck I'm sick of it all!
But that's the worst part isn't it? I don't get to decide if I'm sick and done. Because that would be 'selfish.' Emotionally guilting a person into being alive? totally okay. Killing yourself to spare the pain of waking up for the rest of your life? The most selfish act you can perform. Gods damnit I hate being a human so fucking much!
