Hi Endlessagony,
I'm truly sorry for how you feel, which is kind of strange because today I also decided to 'do it'. I can't see my way out of anything anymore and what strikes me as strange is that I don't care at all if I'd die, but reading your posts my first reaction was: Och, don't do it. There are still good things in life too (such as a beautiful sun rise).
Isn't that strange?
Do you feel the same when you read other people's posts in which they announce that they want to end their lives?
It confuses me a bit because it must mean that, unconsciously, if I have this feelings of hope for others, there must be a little bit of hope for myself in me somewhere too.
Take care, but I'd like to see your reply.