I've forgotten happiness

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by ciera800, Mar 27, 2013.

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  1. ciera800

    ciera800 Member

    i don't even know where to begin......with the fact i don't feel, with the little amounts of pleasure i seem to derive from anything, with my ignorant parents who can't be bothered to get me help? I am so miserable and i can't stand it, i don't feel anything but pain these days and when i'm not in pain i'm completely empty.....i just have no clue what to do anymore, i feel so alone, the only thing that's kept me from killing myself this long is the fact that i'm terrified i'm dying because i don't want to go to hell.....i just........i hate this so called existance i'm living and i just.......i don't know what to do anymore, i'm so lost, i'm tired of crying myself to sleep, i'm tired of feeling empty or stressed, i want to be happy again but nothing i do works and my parents aren't helping.

    I know the first response of anyone who read my emotional abuse post might be saying to dump my boyfriend but to be honest.....when he's around i can feel something, i know how stupid all of this sounds but i just......until i can stand on my own two feet i NEED him in my life, i need to feel some semblance of happiness, some semblance that i'm even human, because right now, i just......i don't feel at all and i don't know what to do....i need help....please.......
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    It is YOU hun that have to get you help Your parents they do not hear your cries so you have to get the help you need How you call your doctor ok you call and tell doctor you are depressed you are feeling so alone in this fight and you get help . Go to hosptal book appt with psychiatrist but do something Staying with an abusive bf just to feel something is not good enough hun YOU DESERVE MORE than that hugs
     
  3. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Ciera. I did read your post on abuse. But i will not comment. Because you said that you are not ready to leave him. So I will keep my lip zipped.
    Regarding what you wrote about needing help and your parents will not help with it, I have a couple of questions
    first, do you have a school counseller who you can talk with? Sometimes they can advocate or even help

    second, Do you suspect that maybe there is alcohol abuse in your family? If so, that would make you eligible for support through ala-teen. Its often a good option for support. so thats why i was thinking of it.

    third, would it be possible for you to talk with your family doctor?

    Also, if you live in the US, you can call united way and they can tell you if there are any support systems in your area that would not require your parents help. usually if you call 211 in the US you will get United way. I did it when I needed help. And i did find someone through them. A wonderful person who advocated for me when I needed it.
     
  4. sweetie, i know how you feel. ive been through that. ive been having issues for 9 years now, and it barley started getting better. one day you will have the strength to stand alone, but you wont be. you have everyone whose been through this before to help you with anything you need. and thats just the first wave of hep. like flowers said, any sort of help from the outside always is a good idea. just remember. never let life kill your spark. give more that what youve got. give all of what youre not. and just hold on. eventually, there will be a hand coming to pull you up. it seems youre christian, so message me, and i can talk to you about the god aspect of all this.
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Ciera, is it possible you could speak to an aunt, uncle or even cousin if your own parents are not listening. I am curious to know how old you are? If over 18, you will not need your parents permission to seek help for yourself. If under 18, you can perhaps see a school/college psychologist or counsellor. Don't ever give up!
     
  6. ciera800

    ciera800 Member

    i only just turned sixteen and if my parents see me with a phone they'll demand to know who i'm calling so yeah......i don't really have much of an option but i'll do what i can.....dscreetly XD
     
  7. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    good. keep posting here. You have lots of people here who care. And we will stand by you !! Teamwork gets results. i am hoping that as a team we all together can figure something out. you are a good person. i can feel it in my heart. You deserve help. And you deserve to be treated well. you deserve good friends, support and, well, peace of mind.
     
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