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I've got to let this out.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by justsomegirl, Feb 1, 2015.

  1. justsomegirl

    justsomegirl Well-Known Member

    So I made what was probably a mistake and am having a drink right now. I don't have a problem with alcohol or anything, it just feels strange to be drinking alone on a Sunday night. I know why I'm upset - I haven't heard from my "boyfriend" in three days, I just tried to call and he rejected it. We've been struggling pretty hard for a while and I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I just can already feel the bad decision fairy on my shoulder. When I get upset and feel hurt and rejected, my usual MO is to find someone to make me feel less alone for a couple of hours. Bad decision, I know, especially if I really want things to work out with the pseudo-boyfriend. But part of me is seriously like, fuck it. I feel like I end up driving everyone away anyway so who cares?

    I just needed to rant somewhere and I logged on here so I wouldn't feel quite as alone. Out of all the bad feelings I have (depression, anxiety, suicidal, e.g.) I think feeling alone by far the worst.

    So I'm going to finish this drink and try not to make any bad decisions, I'm going to go to bed at a respectable time and get up and do a good job at work tomorrow. Because that's what people do, right?
  2. Freyaisonthefloor

    Freyaisonthefloor SF Supporter

    I hope that you sleep well and have a better day tomorrow. Hopefully things with the "boyfriend" work out, whether it's together or individually. I don't know what you are struggling with together, but ignoring someone for three days doesn't seem like the best way to handle things no matter what the circumstances.
  3. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    maybe watch some comedy/sitcome for lighter feelings?
    try not to chase, if he wants he ll be back by himself and you ll have pride intact.
    pls take care