I'm a college student at a private university. I've maintained a 3.9 GPA, I just signed the lease for a house, I'm the daughter that my parents don't worry about. I've felt a heaviness inside of me for at least two years now. Every once and a while I talk to my parents about it and I'm like, "could this be depression?" The thing is, though, I always tell myself to suck it up and keep going. Even if I don't want to do something, I recognize that I have responsibilities. So if I am depressed, I'm functional. . . meaning it's never actually been dealt with. But today, I was able to recognize what this "heaviness" means. My brain just went, "OK, I'm done now. I'm ready to die." And as soon as I recognized this, it actually felt like it lightened. I'm just so tired of being strong. I've had to be strong since I was a toddler. I was sick for the first half of my life and the doctors actually didn't think I'd reach adulthood. I feel like I've been toughing out my entire life and suddenly I'm just going "no, really, I'm done." Does this resonate with anyone?