I had two miscarriages already. One was when I was on my 5th-6th month in 2005, and the last was just a month ago on my 2nd month. I had a glimpse of my first baby's body (stillbirth) before I went unconscious. The next, I only had the joy of being pregnant for 4 days before I was rushed to the hospital. I feel so empty. I've been pregnant twice but I never heard any of my babies cry for me. I never got to touch their little hands and I never got to kiss their tiny mouths. And my boyfriend has a kid from a former partner and it pains me so much that they have a "family" and we still don't have one. I feel jealous of others when they give birth and whenever they celebrate their children's birthdays or whenever I hear Happy Mother's day or Mommy.. I don't know exactly what I should feel.