I've suffered mental health for 23 years at the moment I'm struggling

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#1
I'm not sure what to write I'm new on this forum but I'm struggling like mad to see a way out at the moment every day gets worse I have amazing mental health support but sometimes it's not enough I self harm and starve myself for control I've never been this low I thought maybe expressing my feelings to people who live feeling the same has me could help me feel I'm not alone and people who go through the same are the only people who understand and not judge
 

gypsylee

SF Supporter
#3
Hi @Choc@23 and welcome

I was diagnosed at 19 with Major Depression and I’m 44 now, so that’s a similar amount of time. It’s primarily (social) anxiety I struggle with and substance abuse.

I know how debilitating it can be and you definitely aren’t alone. I hope you find some comfort here.. It’s a pretty great forum :)

Gypsy x
 
#4
I'm not sure what to say I feel I have know control over my life I am judged by every one including family I feel I'm not allowed to express my feelings for been judged which leaves me isolated and frustrated I suffer bipolar and anorexia it's something I've lived with for along time but for some reason I don't seem to be able to improve this time including cutting myself not eating to punish myself and feel I have some control I'm always justifying my actions to people has I feel has will alot of people with mental health problems that your not allowed to express without judgement I'm just in self distruct at minute I thought I'd try by opening up without feeling judged could help me feel it's not just me I'm usually really good at seeing warning signs and dealing with them but that's gone this time every day I hope to wake up feeling a slight change maybe I need to take abit of pressure off myself
 
#5
Hi @Choc@23 and welcome

I was diagnosed at 19 with Major Depression and I’m 44 now, so that’s a similar amount of time. It’s primarily (social) anxiety I struggle with and substance abuse.

I know how debilitating it can be and you definitely aren’t alone. I hope you find some comfort here.. It’s a pretty great forum :)

Gypsy x
I was 23 when I was admitted into hospital for anorexia then I was diagnosed with bipolar I've said previously I'm lucky I have amazing mental health support where some people are not has lucky but there not there all the time and you can't pick what time of day things get so intense that I harm myself so I thought maybe writing my feelings on here could help
Thanks
 

gypsylee

SF Supporter
#6
I have amazing mental health support where some people are not has lucky but there not there all the time and you can't pick what time of day things get so intense that I harm myself so I thought maybe writing my feelings on here could help
Thanks
It can help a lot. I found this place last year while on a mission to find a new mental health forum because the one I was on was dying. I joined quite a few and this ended up as my favourite.
 

Walker

Admin
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#7
Hi there and welcome.
You've def come to the right place for people to actually hear you out and not judge you. There are plenty of others here with issues similar to yours, I'm sure you'll find each other. Keep posting :) See you around.
 
#8
Thank you for being brave and sharing your feelings with us. You are most definitely not alone and this is a great place to share as you won't be judged. We are all fighting our own battles. There is not a single one of us who isn't! I think coming here to share and acknowledging that there is an issue is a great first step. It takes a lot of bravery to share with strangers! You say that you have excellent mental health resources so I am assuming you are seeing a counselor which is a good choice as well to help on the healing journey. You also say you feel judged by family and friends so I am assuming you don't have much support there. Do you have any physical support groups in your area? Although on-line forums are helpful, having others near you to talk to, understand, keep you accountable is so needed as well! It sounds like in the past you have been able to overcome some of these negative thoughts and actions, but this time it sounds like you have lost hope. Did something recently happen to put you in this downward spiral? Why do you think it's different this time?
 
#10
Thank you for being brave and sharing your feelings with us. You are most definitely not alone and this is a great place to share as you won't be judged. We are all fighting our own battles. There is not a single one of us who isn't! I think coming here to share and acknowledging that there is an issue is a great first step. It takes a lot of bravery to share with strangers! You say that you have excellent mental health resources so I am assuming you are seeing a counselor which is a good choice as well to help on the healing journey. You also say you feel judged by family and friends so I am assuming you don't have much support there. Do you have any physical support groups in your area? Although on-line forums are helpful, having others near you to talk to, understand, keep you accountable is so needed as well! It sounds like in the past you have been able to overcome some of these negative thoughts and actions, but this time it sounds like you have lost hope. Did something recently happen to put you in this downward spiral? Why do you think it's different this time?
I have a support worker physiatrist physiologist and social worker at the moment working hard to get me back to a place that is not has dark anyone with mental health problems will know we're always judged and don't always feel they have the freedom to speach without it been questioned if your sad your depressed if your angry your having a mood swings etc when actually that's just how we feel not because we have mental health problems the only thing that has changed is I got divorced but that was fine myself and my ex get on really well now and he's very supportive but family have dominated my decisions and instead of doing what was best for me I did what was best for them so I wouldn't have to keep justifying myself the frustration and pace they wanted me to do things have got too much until I've ended up harming starving myself just to try and feel I have some control I know it won't fix over night put with all the support I get right know hopefully I can get back on my feet and not listen to others and stand my ground and only do what I want with my life maybe going through such a painful time right now will become a positive in the future by hoping to not allow myself to keep been judged
Thank you for taking your time
 

Jasonpi

Well-Known Member
#11
Choc, I for one love reading you comments/threads…. I relate to it all.. Sounds like you are really doing good to be so aware. . wish I could write as well as you do..

J.p.
 
#13
I think I can write so well about mental health because I have had so much support in the last 22 years which sadly some people don't get this help I am really passionate about mental health has it is brushed under the carpet in society not allowing us and many more left feeling alone and unable to express there feelings without judgement I just go off track at times and even though I know the answers and knowledge of what I should do I struggle to put it in place
Take care glad I can bring some comfort to yourselves and hopefully many others
 
#15
Choc. TY. Mothers day is the worse day in the world for me so yes reading our thread does bring comfort. Ty
I don't have to say if it's too personal to yourself the reason for dreading mother's day is it a relationship with your own mum or has a parent like I state don't feel you have to say why it's your choice
Take care
 
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