its gonna sounds evil but today i got really jealous of my mate. im really confused. she's got big scabs on her arms that look like she fell off a swing or something but she said her dog did it. my other mate todays told me that she self harms. so my mate that selfharms hangs round with another girl that used to self harm too. i dont know why but as soon as my other mate told me she self harms rather than feeling sorry for her i felt angry & jealous, i cut but no one knows and it just kinda made me annoyed that she does it and everyone noticed and cares, but ive been doing it for over a year and none of my mates or anyone noticed. in one way id rather keep it secret & i will but then it really pisses me off that they care about her, not me :sad: i dont know, but i always thought self harming kind of belonged to me, cos nobody else at school or i know does it. so it kinda made me feel unique & even though cutting hurts , i like it & now it feels like she's stolen my identity. im confuzzled. :dry: i dont wanna feel jealous cause its really mean of me but thinking about it just makes me wanna cut, but then i get even more angry cos kinda someone else has already... going round in a circle..earlier i cut below my wrist & now it's really sore the blood dried up round it :sad: . just needed to type this cos i cant talk to anyone about it in real life.