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Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Terry, Mar 27, 2012.

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  1. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Best blond joke you'll ever read!

    Two sisters, one blond and one brunette,

    inherit the family ranch.Unfortunately, after just a few years, they

    are in financial trouble....

    In order to keep the bank from repossessing

    the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their

    own stock.

    Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister,

    'When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to

    drive out after me and haul it home.'

    The brunette arrives at the man's ranch,

    inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it.

    The man tells her that he will sell it for

    $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to

    send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.

    She walks into the telegraph office, and says,

    'I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a

    bull for our ranch and I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup

    truck and drive out here so we can haul it home.'

    The telegraph operator explains that he'll be

    glad to help her, then adds, it will cost 99 cents a word.

    Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette

    realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word.

    After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and

    says, 'I want you to send her the word 'comfortable.'

    The operator shakes his head. 'How is she ever

    going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup

    truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you

    send her just the word 'comfortable?'

    The brunette explains, 'My sister's blonde.

    The word is big.

    She'll read it very slowly... 'com-for-da-bul.'
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni


    Carl was installing a new door and found that one of the hinges was missing


    He asked his wife Marnie if she would go to Home Depot and pick up a hinge.


    Marnie agreed to go. While she was waiting for the manager to finish serving a customer,
    her eye caught a beautiful bathroom faucet.


    When the manager was finished, Marnie asked him,
    "How much is that faucet?"


    The manager replied, "That's a gold plated faucet and the price is $500.00.

    Marnie exclaimed, "My goodness, that?s an expensive faucet -- certainly out of my price range.."

    She then proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy.

    The manager said that he had them in stock and went into the storeroom to get one.

    From the storeroom the manager yelled.

    "Ma'am, you wanna screw for the hinge?"

    Marnie shouted back,

    "No, but I will for the faucet."

    This is why you can't
    send a woman to Home Depot.
  3. lightbeam

    lightbeam Antiquities Friend

  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hehehe...but Pea will do it for even a few feathers!!!
  5. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Haha thanks for the laugh! I really needed it right now
  6. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

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