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Discussion in 'After Effects' started by blackie, Sep 15, 2007.

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  1. blackie

    blackie Member

    Dont, no matter how high, there is always a chance it wont kill you, but by then you've hit the ground and its fucking hard:sad:

    I now get to spend the rest of my life in constant pain in a wheelchair.
    the consequences of failing are a bitch, so please dont.

  2. JustWatchMeChange

    JustWatchMeChange Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry, blackie. When did you jump? I know u were posting, I just read your reply to me and it made me smile.
  3. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    are you seriousy paralysed?
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    blackie, I am sorry you had to find out what failed attempts can do to make your life even worse than you thought it already was. You now face new challenges. I hope that despite this, you can find value in yourself. Perhaps your words will keep someone else from harming themselves. You are a courageous person. :hug:
  5. blackie

    blackie Member

    It was about 15yrs ago when i first had a major problem with wanting to kill myself, so I've kinda got used to it, lucky enough not to be paralysed, just broke and crushed way too many bones to make walking a fun experience !
    Have tried over the yrs. to show people that its not a good idea, and sitting there in a wheelchair kinda works!
    Anyway that was then, and this is now, with me back in the same place i started, "but i aint jumping off no building, fool" sorry always thought Mr T was funny.

    Thanks for listening
  6. JustWatchMeChange

    JustWatchMeChange Well-Known Member

    Wow blackie, thanks for sharing. You have an opportunity to save a lot of lives. Guess there is some meaning to your situation. Hope I find some in mine.

    God Bless
  7. gag

    gag Well-Known Member

    Wow man, that is pretty harsh.
    I think jumping off a building would be the last thing I'd do, however I go I want to be intact, jumping off a building or bridge just doesn't seem like the way to do it.
  8. White Dove

    White Dove Well-Known Member

    I am so sorry that happened to you..

    I know all to well what its like to fail at an attempt..I am 35 years old and i failed.at age 32,. i took an OD that damaged my liver , that got it in a disease , that developed into a tumor , that then became cancer, that then spread before it was found and now 3 years later ( or was it two?? i have slept since then ) i am practly on my death bed.. Although i can still get around pretty good but winters coming on and being given 6 months or less to live means that more then likely i will either be bedridden by this christmas or dead depending upon how much faster the cancer will spread.. Will be in hospice care and all soon..

    If you need a friend i am here.. online a pm away.. so if you need or just want to chat just pm this little white dove anytime.. i am on every day most the time :hug:
  9. p3cky

    p3cky Account Closed

    that is some story, i could never jump though just to stand that chance of it failing it would be horrible, is it horrible for you?
  10. Sasuke

    Sasuke Active Member

    yea thats definetly not a pleasant way to go.
  11. amylou

    amylou Well-Known Member

    Jumping would'nt be my chosen way to go besides I don't like hights
  12. Darken

    Darken Well-Known Member

    I think its one of the most sure ways of dying though? would be horrible to hit the ground and be in pain before you died or lived, but I think 6 stories and over is like 98% probability.
  13. blackie

    blackie Member

    Thanks for listening folks, and white dove, I'm so sorry, will pm you later.
    It wasn't really a decision i took to jump, you just have to be in a very bad place, where you just do something, i had no control over what i did that day, most of my memories of it are a kinda floating above distant, just watching kinda thing, sorry dont know if that makes any sense, also get flashbacks of hitting the ground, so not much fun.
    anyway, gotta go now to shrink appointment, will pop back later.

  14. Puddytat

    Puddytat Well-Known Member


    i always thought if i had to do it that would be the way, not because im sure it will get the job done, only because i feel there might be a time when im so out of my mind that i would do something just on the impulse, without even thinking, because i have a habit of just saying, ok just do it, with anything so 1 fleeting moment i could be high up somewhere and just take a step and it would be too late. i always thought most people died before they even hit the ground, nice to know you dont, i couldnt live with impact flashbacks my whole life. you have so much strength, i admire u, power to u :goodjob:
  15. blackie

    blackie Member

    Your right fency, it is something that i did, at a time when i was unable to think about what i was doing, the impulse thing that you mentioned, that fleeting moment, an understanding of what you may be capable of doing is scarey.
  16. JLT

    JLT Member

    Jumps from higher than 150 feet (10-12 stories) over land and 250 feet over water are almost always fatal; however most suicide attempts are from considerably lower. The consequences of lower jumps are unpredictable, and permanent injuries, including paralysis, are common. Jumping is thus a particularly bad choice for a suicidal gesture.
  17. Trip the Dark fantastic

    Trip the Dark fantastic Well-Known Member

    Blackie, thanks for sharing, what must be (must have been) a traumatic ?? incident in your live. It reminds me through the airy-fairy haze of romanticizing and glorifying death, that reality is a much harsher lover....and everything has a cause and effect, which in turn is the cause of the next event...

    The attraction of jumping is tempting. It is the running away, the escaping, the leaving behind whatever might have caused pain, which makes jumping such a powerful prospect.

    Confronted with the 'flight of fight response', I too would choose the flight...

    However, (and there always seems to be a however...) I don't run anymore. I stand still till all my rainbows have turned into black and white.

    My time will be when I avoid walking even in the light of a full moon. I find myself already wooed by shadows cast of his pale light...But thats just me.

    There is an extraordinary moving film called 'the bridge(2006)'. It stretched my perception of time into nearly unbearable slivers of pain...


    http://www.moviemaze.de/media/trailer/view/13689/29285125558d06f79e43e132aacafacb/2915_trailer01-en_640.mov trailer

  18. IKnowIt'sOver

    IKnowIt'sOver Member

    I'm sorry to hear about your condition blackie, I have heard of people surviving 200ft jumps and falls from out of planes (light private ones at lower altitudes though). How far did you fall from and onto what?
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