I joined this forum about eight months ago. Since then things have gotten both better and worse. I decided coming out as a bisexual guy would help make me feel better about myself. Well I came out to my friends and that has been met with some mixed reactions but my friends remain. I came out to my parents, well I was more outed and didn't lie about it. When that happened my dad said he was extremely dissapointed and didn't think I'd amount to anything in life anymore. He threatened to kick me out of the house and forced me to go to therapy in the hopes that maybe I was just confused (he used the word disturbed) and the therapist could convince me I'm actually straight. It was extremely hurtful and my mom's reaction was just about the same. Fortunatly my mom has come around rather nicely but that initial coming out was terrible. Since my last suicide attempt I have been diagnosed with HIV but had followup tests come back showing indeterminant. It's frustrating because I can't definitivly say one way or the other if I have it and just have to wait things out to know for sure. I have not been able to get in a real relationship because everyone is scared away by this. I just really want someone for a real relationship to love but I can't seem to get close to anyone. I'm still not as bad as I was when I registered for this site but I'm just so frustrated with life I just don't want to go on.