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Do you know this feeling... of a special day comming up, tho you don't care **** even tho everyone else is hyped about it and you have to play along as they but so much work and funn into it, tho you just think "kill me now i want to be alone and have a chilled day with no stress or care for the world"... yeah its that time of year again for me....sooooon....tooo soooon, and right after i will have to fucking work my ass of again for 6 months. i need a change of pace and surrounding so bad. but what can you do is everything is preset to go...that...one...direction!... fuck life and its ways. beeing free is something you loose at some point in your life and then you walk ...that...path you where set up with, or you choose to take even if you did not fully intendet it to be that exact path.
yeah i know i often say change it yourself but if its the only path you can really take right now as its the one right now that would be choosen to be the best, (ignoring the fact that its the only one you know) as other better paths lurk in the hollow bejond laughting at what the hell i took this path as those would have been much grater. but whatever.
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now its clening my room, finding old memorys, putting them in boxes, and changing my room a pit, its the smallest thing i can change but it should have an impact. and i guess i reaaaalllyyy need to start my sport routine again afterwords... and maby backing cookies so i can eat all of what i have to get rid with sports again ^^