Just a Rememberance

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by AlexElm, Apr 28, 2011.

  1. AlexElm

    AlexElm Well-Known Member

    Before I begin, this is a remembrance to someone you don't know.
    This is just a rememberance for Melinda, who died on the 29th April 2009. I have known her for as long as I remember, as she grew by me ever since I went to school. Sometimes I remember the maths races we used to have and the places we used to go. To be clear, I was not her boyfriend but someone who went to a program for anybody who's IQ was over 125. Getting off topic. Sorry. Anyway... I grew kind of...fond of her, not that kind of lusting love but that kind of fond love, one that grew every year.

    So the next time I went to the program I didn't see her that day Or the day after that. Then after a week I was informed that she had died from a car crash.

    I was absolutely shocked. I remember crying in the bathroom stalls, my friends oblivious to my emotional havoc. I was also remembering the times we went out (with the program) and we used to play word games that we wrote on each others skin. The thing that had stumped me all these years was what I thought you wrote as "imu". Girls giggled when you wrote it and I still have no idea what it means.
    So, it's been two years Melinda and I don't now what has happened to me after you went away. I have (unfortunately) been closing myself up, only showing a mask of my inner turmoil and I really feel like you're the only one who can help me out of this. I hope you're having fun up there.

    So Melinda, you have been gone for exactly two years now and I still love you. May you rest in peace.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Bless your heart if you read to the end it actually means a lot to me. Also, I would really like to ask you what "imu" means. It's one of those word games where you write a word/s on the back of someones hand and you have to guess it... It was the last thing she wrote for me and she used to write that a lot, just to tease me.

    Again, thanks for reading to the end.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 28, 2011
  2. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    I read it and my heart goes to you and her family.

    not sure what imu means but imo means in my opinion.
     
  3. rzph

    rzph New Member

    Wow. This post really hit home. I am deeply sorry for your loss and my condolences go out for her family and loved ones as well. Losing someone you grew up with can be really difficult. Especially when you realize you were in love with them either after the fact or that you never had the chance to really tell them how you felt. I lost a girl who was close to me up to the end of my high school years back in 2010. She was even my girlfriend for a time.

    From the texts that I've read and based on my own opinion (though it might not be very qualified or valid so I do apologize), I think that the relations and experiences which you have at a younger age have a fairly noticeable effect in determining who you will be... how you will turn out. That being said, Melinda sounded like a very bright, gentle person and I'm confident she some positive effects on you. Still, it seems unfair to have someone so special taken away from you in the blink of eye. Initially it seemed to me like they just left without a trace. Still so many loose ends if you will. But after months of reflection, I have come to a different conclusion. That is, the ones that we love who grew up by our side are NEVER truly gone. They simply can't be. Why? A part of them still exists in YOU given that they helped MOLD the person you are. So when you start thinking of why you started acting a certain way (e.g. became more determined), you can trace it back to them. Even if everyone else forgets them, you definitely won't.

    I guess what I'm trying to say is I hope you find some comfort in knowing that she really cared for you being your childhood friend and all and that she still lives on... as a part of you. Whether she made you specifically more outgoing, determined, patient etc. that doesn't matter. Our loved ones can definitely change us for the better and we can honour their memory by taking their lessons to heart and facing the future - living our lives as best as we can. I think that's what they'd want.

    That's just my two cents. Sorry I don't know what 'imu' means either. Wish you all the best.
     
  4. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    awwww, i'm sorry to hear about melinda