Just about had enough

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by brknsilence, Sep 3, 2016.

  1. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thoughts has been going through my head and I just about had enough. I have cried a lot last night and this morning. Been up since 2:30am and felt worse then yesterday - emotionally.

    Just been thinking it's best I wasn't here anymore. Just burdening everyone and causing problems, not meaning to.

    Trying to convince myself on reasons to stay. Hoping these reasons will keep me going.

    So tired and depressed. Just want it to end.

    Sorry everyone. I haven't been the best.

    Just going to do my best to get through today. I have to. No choice really.
     
  2. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hugs. You do not need to apologize. Maybe try to take a nap sometime today. Keep distracting.
     
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  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    (hugs) to you.
    That is all anyone can ask of you hun. It really is. You're an amazing person with incredible strength and courage, you will get through this :)
     
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  4. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thanks everyone

    Just sad, I was even going through my head on writing a note and everything at 3am.

    Will try to get a nap later on, if possible.

    So down.
     
  5. lifetalkz

    lifetalkz Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry that you're stuck in a dark place right now-most everyone on SF has been there many times. All I can offer you is a coping skill that I have developed over time. When I get stuck, like you are now-I become very selfish. I think of myself as a good friend who has suffered through a lot and needs my love and attention. Then I give to myself the kindness and compassion that I deserve. I let everyone else go for a short while and think only of nurturing myself back into a better place in my mind. I can be there for friends and family-only when I get right with myself, the relationship with myself is the single most important thing.

    You've been through so much heartbreak, sadness and loss-I strongly encourage you to be kind to yourself, treat yourself with gentle, loving tenderness. You would do the same for so many other people-why not do it for yourself? You deserve it. The people who love you will forgive you if you go off on your own island for awhile and take care of yourself. They just want you to be happy and feel some peace in your heart-I want the same, so does everyone on SF (I'm sure). I hope this helps you-I've followed this practice for over a decade and it has helped me a lot. Good luck to you-LT
     
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  6. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

  7. Frances M

    Frances M Mountain Woman

    I hope you're doing better this morning. When I fell into those dark places, all I could think of was I want it all to end. It's the kind of pain that not many people can understand. Nothing fixes it, it just takes time to heal and try to do better. I wish you the best to get through this. xx
     
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  8. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thanks

    Just trying to get through today the best I can. Still down. Thoughts aren't as bad as earlier. Hoping it gets better. Just feel hopeless.
     
  9. Frances M

    Frances M Mountain Woman

    Do you write? I find that writing (or typing) everything out is so therapeutic. It helps release that hopelessness and sadness in me. I sometimes just write fictional stories to get my anger/grief/fear out. It's a good distraction for me. Just a thought.
     
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  10. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    I miss writing. Maybe something to try again
     
  11. Frances M

    Frances M Mountain Woman

    I have a private blog that I use. I write as though it were public, I put photos, inspirational quotes and all that. It's a structured daily task I do and it helps me a lot.
     
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  12. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    That's good
     
  13. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    (huggles) you're fantastic, keep being you. I hope you have a nice day :)
     
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  14. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thanks

    Hugs

    Feel like crying again.
     
  15. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Cry if you need to, it can help get it all out :)
     
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  16. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member