Well this i my first post here! No offense to anyone but i don't see the point in writing how you are 'going to kill yourself', if your are going to do it then just do it and stop wasting everyones time and wanting everyone to feel sorry for you, because in this life NO ONE does. My mate did this a while ago, he overdosed on pills at a local beach and what does he do... he sends an sms to his priest apologizing for everything???? In other words he was never gong to kill himself, he just wanted attention. Anyone who is truly going to kill themselves will do so, without all the whining. It is not hard to do so. The people who need the most help are those who say nothing. I'm the same, i have every thing going for me at the moment, i'm young (22) and doing very well for myself being self employed - with exception to my Gambling and Alcohol addiction !!!. Thats right, for example the past 3 weeks i lost over 14,000 gambling, and prob spent every single day at the pub drinking. I've been doing this for the past 3 years. Every cent i make goes back to gambling, and i seriously cannot stop. For me gambling is an escape, i cant stand this life anymore. IT TOTALLY SUCKS!. I just cant see the point!> I thought that when i have money things would change, the only thing that changed was i'm now a coke addict!!!! I dont understand how people get up every day, goto work, work their arses off all day for a wage???. I juts don't get it. Like what the fuck is the point of that. Here i am, i earn over 200K a year for myself, i do basically nothing at all, and yet i'm the one whos depressed and loosing everything gambling! I'm not one to have a bitch, i just came across this website and thought well I may as well add my fucked up story. lol. The problem is every one like my family think i have money, they have no idea how much i loose gambling, I'm at a stage now where i'm willing to do anything to get my losses back. I hate loosing, i spent my whole fucking life being looked down upon and i finally made something of myself with my business, only to get a fucking gambling problem. I don't get it, you see i hate it when i hear people say they are addicted to smoking. I dont belive in addiction, its all mental, yet here i am loosing tens of thousands a week gambling and physically getting angry now when i loose. I'm not going to kill myself, if i was i would do it, and not be hear writing this shit. I just have no idea how i should help myself ?? Speaking to someone does nothing, many people have told me to stop, but i just cant help it anymore its like principle of the matter i just want to fuck the pubs up.