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Just another new member...

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by Youlleatamuffinandlikeit, Oct 24, 2010.

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  1. Youlleatamuffinandlikeit

    Youlleatamuffinandlikeit Well-Known Member


    I don't know how I should start this, really...I have been through a tremendous amount of suffering and torment these past few years. Such that I don't think I could adequately describe it with words.

    I have battled all my adult life with very black depressions, which ever I feel is lurking to swallow me up if I don't stay on top. I have also dealt with severe body image issues. I know how that can destroy you. Believe me.

    When I was at my worst, for a whole year I was suicidal. In such agony I wanted to die **every single day**. I felt so low about myself that I could only leave the house at night, and even then in disguise. My life became an endless prison of terrible nothingness.

    On top of these struggles, I have also had to come to terms with my sexuality as a gay man. Brought up in a strict religious household, this was less than an easy thing. When I was finally able to accept myself and met my first love, sadly things did not go well. I was sucked into an abusive relationship. And I fell very deeply in love with this abuser. Extricating myself from his control was not easy.

    I don't know what else to say, except that it is never too late and that you have to fight. Fight everything that betrays you and refuse to be a victim of the crap you can't fully control. You absolutely have to take the power back.

    The true test is not what is thrown at us, but how we choose to deal with it.
  2. ilovedilostwhatnow

    ilovedilostwhatnow Active Member

    wow it sounds like youve gone thourgh alot well im here to tell you your not alone i know i may seem young but it doesnt mean i dont understand im here for you
  3. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Welcome to SF. I hope you find the support you need.

    I like your username.
  4. Youlleatamuffinandlikeit

    Youlleatamuffinandlikeit Well-Known Member


    Thanks a lot I appreciate it. I know what it is to feel totally lost. We have to support each other.
  5. Youlleatamuffinandlikeit

    Youlleatamuffinandlikeit Well-Known Member

    Why thank you, Muffins4President ;p
  6. KatyKate

    KatyKate Antiquities Friend

    Hi...:welcome: to SF....hope that you will join us in the chatroom sometime. The fantastic people on here have been a life-line for me since I joined in September...I have had some very dark days over the last four months, and one failed suicide attempt in August. I myself have suffered with my mental health since I was 25, and I'm now 39...I have accepted that there is no cure, you just learn to cope better (or at least try to...failed this time) each time another relapse happens.
    Anyway I hope you will join us sometime, and likewise if you want to PM me or have a private chat (in the chatroom) you are more than welcome.
    Kate xx
  7. Youlleatamuffinandlikeit

    Youlleatamuffinandlikeit Well-Known Member


    Nice to meet cha'! I can really relate to what you say about there being no 'cure'. I don't think mental health issues ever really 'go away'. I have met no-one who is truly free...the best we can hope for is to learn how to deal with them as best we can. I'm in a better place right now {I always feel weird saying that, almost as though I'm tempting fate. Anybody else get that?} and I feel its important to reach out to other people who can at least relate to what I have been through. No-one in my 'real' life can begin to understand.
  8. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Welcome to the forums!! I'm sure you will fit in rather well here..
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