I am so down and lost, life has so little hope for me. I suffer from PTSD due to a very bad relationship with a drug addict. I had a bad panic attack not long ago and wrecked my car into another one, now I may be facing jail or prison time. I have crippling debt and am pretty much homeless, I stay with friends but not for much longer. I have no close friends and no partner, no one to rely on. I loved my ex so much and all she did was steal and lie and drive me crazy. I plan suicide every day, write notes, the only reason I stay alive is that I have a little girl who I love very much, though it will be a very long time until I get to see her. I cannot enjoy life anymore. I just want to hold someone and feel safe and loved again but it seems so far away and everything feels like such a lie. I am so full of fear and hate and sadness now. I can't kill myself because I won't let my daughter down but I want to so bad. I wish I had someone, something in my life to keep me going.