just getting it all out

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by meagainstme, Jan 12, 2007.

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  1. meagainstme

    meagainstme Well-Known Member

    after started the day in a good mood, i am now back to my down self.

    i cant handle feeling this shit anymore!!!

    i decided to finish with my girlfriend tonight. its for the best. ive got too much shit in my mind already and having a gf just adds to my paranoia. and that is not fair on her. and it turns out the feeling is mutual. so it is good that we have turned out to be good friends at the end of it all this. and although i know its for the best, i feel sad. i had such a close bond with her, and now ive lost that affection.

    my mind keeps going over and over all this shit thats ever happened to me. practically every person ive ever known has run me into the ground and hurt me so much. i dont think i have anything left inside of me to crush anymore.

    im empty. there is nothing to me. i have nothing left to give the world.
     
  2. Maxii..

    Maxii.. Well-Known Member

    there's always something left.. there has to be..
    you can always start again..
    hang on to that..
    and don't do anything stupid..

    good luck..
     
  3. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    well may be that´s the best for both because you can concentrate in feeling better and then you may come together again, may be the feeling will be stronger. remember that where it was fire, ashes still there, so i think that you won´t lose that bond. anyway good luck and i hope to see you around. take care:)
     
  4. Cheryl

    Cheryl Well-Known Member

    you are hurting right now. its temporary. its not forever.

    i'm sorry that you feel like you've lost the affection you once had with your gf. it seems that it is best for both of you right now to focus on what you need. it can be too much to think about how to navigate through your problems and keep a gf happy. this requires a lot of energy that you don't have right now. but, its not forever. you'll get your energy back. this is temporary. you will know the kind of bond and affection that you long for again. you will. but right now...you've gotta take care of you.

    i'm glad you're here with us. we want to support you in any way that we can.

    oh, i hate that you feel like every person you've ever known has failed you. that is painful. and i'm so sorry. i know that hurts. i've been there. at one point i wanted to punish all those people who hurt me and caused me pain by ending my life. people do the best they can and they will still fail us. they will never meet all of our expectations. so, what to do? you learn how to be the kind of person you want "others" to be. you treat people like you would want to be treated. you be the kind of friend to "others" that you would want to have or be around.

    you know unfortunately a lot of people don't have the capacity or skills needed to support others. so we have to forgive them. and we have to learn how to cope. we have to learn how to navigate life. and one of the first things we need to do is to FORGIVE THEM. BECAUSE, most of them have NO CLUE how badly that have hurt us. Hurt people hurt people. Its sad. But, its a fact. So, they CAN'T give you what they DON'T have to give. now, you have to find those who can support you. find those who do know how to cope with life. and learn from them. you learn how to cope. and then coach others how they to can LIVE.

    You may feel empty. But, you're in pain. You may feel like you have nothing to give, but your pain distorts what's real. You were created with a very unique gift. there is no one like you on the planet. and only you can GIVE the world this gift. only you can share your gift with the world. Find out what it is....because the world is waiting on you to share this gift. You're future is amazingly bright. When you give away this gift that you've been given, its already inside of you....then, you will have all of the love, respect and affection you could ever want.

    God bless,
     
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