Just gonna end it all =(

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Pasta08, Feb 1, 2012.

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  1. Pasta08

    Pasta08 Banned Member

    No one cares and i always get ignored and people only seem to care when i can do shit for them fuck it all even my sister and her kids are treating me horrible i am just one big failure.
  2. Lucano

    Lucano Well-Known Member

    We care. Even if you don't see it and is hard to feel it, you are loved. Just stop for a moment. Ending it won't change things and is surely going to hurt more than one person. It never is that simple. You're a not a big failure, don't put yourself down. Hang on there, you have us here.
  3. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    You better not hurt yourself...I care a lot. I wasn't here earlier because I was at the store...I'm here now. So please, don't hurt yourself. You are one of the only friends I have on here and I don't want to lose you.
  4. HollowRhythms

    HollowRhythms Well-Known Member

    Hey Pasco, we dont know each other well, but from what i've seen of you isn't anything bad, and all of those people in your life are really missing out... I'm real sorry that you're feeling like this. It's very difficult to be in a crowded room and no one hear your screams. . Hope you get through today and things start to look up for you soon. . . :hug:
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey hun hope you are feeling someone better keep posting okay keep letting us know how you are doing hugs
  6. RonPSH

    RonPSH Banned Member

    Hey Pasco....You're not the failure...the failure is in "society". 99% of people are lost in their egos and their mental confusion and depends on others to make them happy. So when they need happiness, they come to you and you feel used.

    I didn't "accept" or "love" myself until I came to see this. That transformation happened two and a half years ago. It led me to create a self help blogsite and my self healing story is here.... http://www.profound-self-help.com/adhd-self-help.html

    My mom took her life....it didn't help anyone. Her confusion got passed along to the people around her. I'm the only one that figured it out and now I try to help.

  7. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    I hope you are doing ok. Haven't seen you on at all today so I'm a bit worried.
  8. Pasta08

    Pasta08 Banned Member

    Feel so suicidal and worthless and just feel like ending it all.
  9. RonPSH

    RonPSH Banned Member

    "The idea of unworthiness torture millions of human beings.
    It is the people around you who make you feel unworthy,
    undeserving, useless, good-for-nothing;
    this is a secret conspiracy
    against the individual by the crowd.

    Perhaps you are not aware that
    the crowd is the enemy of the individual.
    The crowd does not like individuals;
    it likes only phony people imitating each other.
    Anybody who stands alone, in his own right,
    declaring his own freedom,
    doing his own thing without any fear of consequences,
    will be condemned by the crowd.

    The masses are easy to control;
    those people who are in power hate individuals.
    And this has been the story throughout human history.
    From the very childhood, the society in different ways –
    the parents, the teachers, the priests, the neighbors –
    from all directions the society starts
    encroaching upon the freedom of the individual.
    All their effort is to distract you from your own being;
    they want you to be somebody else,
    they don’t want you to be yourself.
    That is the cause of your feeling of being unworthy.

    The crowd cannot afford such rebels,
    because their very presence is dangerous –
    it may become a wildfire.
    Many others who are suffering in slavery
    may start revolting, seeing that it is possible
    to live your life , according to your own light,
    that it is possible to have your own style,
    your own religiousness, your own morality –
    you don’t have to belong to any crowd.
    you don’t have to become a spiritual slave.
    If this idea spreads, there will be millions of people
    who have not died completely –
    in whose beings there is still a spark of life –
    who may explode into rebellion against the masses.

    It is natural – you can never be somebody else;
    however perfect your pretension and your hypocrisy is,
    deep down you will feel you have betrayed yourself.
    Deep down you can never feel contentment, self-respect,
    a pride which is natural to every being,
    a dignity which existence showers
    upon you just by giving you life.
    If you are allowed to be yourself,
    you will never feel unworthy,
    because that will be your natural growth.

    If you are a rosebush, roses will blossom in you,
    If you are a marigold flower,
    then marigold flowers will come.
    Neither the marigold flower feels it is unworthy
    nor the roses feel that they are special, higher, or holier.
    Even the smallest grass blade feels
    as dignified as the biggest star in the universe.

    In existence, there is no inferiority complex anywhere,
    and as a corollary there is no superiority complex either.
    The marigold is happy being a marigold;
    even the idea is stupid: ”Why am I not a rose?”
    It will be a very poor existence where
    there are only roses and roses and roses,
    and no other flowers.
    Roses will lose all their beauty.

    The variety of millions of flowers
    makes existence rich beyond all our dreams.
    But the society wants you to be just a sheep.
    You may have the qualities of being a deer,
    or being a tiger, or being a lion, or being an eagle –
    all the varieties are possible in different individuals –
    but the society likes only one brand:
    everybody has to be a sheep.
    Now, if you force a lion to be a sheep,
    he is going to feel unworthy.
    You are imposing something upon him which is not natural.

    This feeling of unworthiness is because of
    an imposition of unnatural demands upon you,
    made by everybody around you.
    Nobody likes you as you are;
    everybody wants you to be this, to be that.

    Of course if you fulfill their demands
    you will be loved, respected, honored,
    but it is very dangerous and very costly;
    you will have to lose yourself.
    You will become just a hypocrite,
    and what will be the gain-
    their respect, their honor, or their rewards?
    They cannot balance the loss – you have lost your soul.
    They can give you Nobel Prizes,
    but even a thousand Nobel Prizes cannot make up for
    the loss that you have suffered in the transaction.
    You have lost your very space in existence,
    your very territory,
    your most significant essential being
    and consciousness."

    ~~Osho ♥
  10. Pasta08

    Pasta08 Banned Member

    Can't do anything right :( Can't help anyone :( just gonna die cause thats all i am good for :(
  11. meaningless-vessel

    meaningless-vessel Well-Known Member

    I don't believe you can't do anything right mr... I've chatted with you a few times in the chatroom here. And I've seen a likeable chap. Yes there's probably a lot more going on that I don't know, but I do like our little 'fun' spells in chat. - If you could reconsider - now would be a good time :)
  12. Pasta08

    Pasta08 Banned Member

    idk bout that :(
  13. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    You better not kill yourself hun. You are going to be a father soon, and you will be a great one, despite what you may think. I know that you will do just fine. :smile:
  14. RonPSH

    RonPSH Banned Member

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