just introducing myself

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by _trish, Nov 4, 2012.

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  1. _trish

    _trish New Member

    Well I'm Trish and I'm 23 years old. I am/was/?? married but sadly, going through a divorce. My husband came home from work one day and I had dinner ready for him on the table and we ate and watched a movie. While I was in the shower, he went into our bedroom and packed my bags and by the time I got out, he was standing there telling me that he wasn't happy and was filing for divorce and eventually made me to leave that night. That's the only explanation I got, that he was unhappy.

    I've had moments of good and bad in my life and I went through a long period of my childhood of thinking of ways to end my life, since my marriage I've had a couple episodes but nothing to major. I would talk to my husband and he really did make things better. He was the only person I ever confided in about my thoughts like that. Now I had to move back in with my parents and I can't talk to them about it without feeling like I'm more of a failure than I'm already am. So I came here just desperate for a friend and people to understand.

    It's only been a little over a month since my husband left me and I attempted and obviously failed. I wouldn't particularly say it's because I feel like I can't live without him, but it just hurts so bad being by myself. If that makes any since at all?

    Anyways, I'm sorry this is my introduction. It's the first time I really put myself out there besides on a marriage forum which just tore me down and just told me I deserved all this. So this is me, trying.
  2. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    Hi Trish and sorry to hear about what happened. No words can fix it from this end, but you have friends here. Welcome!
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi hun i am so sorry you husband hurt you so. hun It will take awhile hun to grieve you loss but you can move on hun. You can talk here to us no judgements just people who care and understand hugs
  4. Moat

    Moat Banned Member

    Cooee from all of us from the Commonwealth of Australia (and, of course, :bubbles:).

    This World is full of people who try and put you down for nothing more than the sheer sake of their own selfishness and I can understand how hard it has been for you to hear that even people on other forums tell you that it is your fault for your current predicament, I would like to hope that you try and realise that, while some things you could done better at in your marriage, blame is never one-way street and reading from what you said about how your ex so casually sat down and ate dinner with you without a word only to tell you afterwards when you got out of the shower that he was leaving you, then you are not as guilty as you think If he were a true gentleman, then he would not have resorted to that cowards way of telling you everything was over.
    I understand how upset you are for this to happen and I assume that you had no idea that it was even coming, but to blame yourself for it is just not right at all. he is equally as responsible and you should hold onto the thought that if he was as innocent, then he would have talked with you sooner about the problems you both were having and taken the manly approach and spoken to you about them, instead of going behind your back and bluntly blurted out that he was filing for divorce.
    No, I will say that you should not feel grief over what has happened, when you have been with him for so long, and I will not pretend to say that what you still feel for him will ever go away any time soon, but I would like venture a word here, that while you look back on all yourself together and compare them with what has happened now, you should not see this as something bad, but a great opportunity to give yourself some time to yourself and see that you have a brand new future to which you can devote yourself to being happy away from the negative influences of what you had currently been living with.
    Although I know that what I say probably makes little sense or cheers you up in the slightest, I would still like to think that it is a little food for thought for you.

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