Just my thoughts, what my brain puts to paper.

[Veng]

The blood emerges from my skin, I watch as it emerges for the first time,

I'm mesmerized by the dark red liquid, its beauty, its warmth slowly flows down my arm, I watch as the first drop falls, it falls in to the dark in to the nothingness,
as I watch it fall soon after its sister fallows fallows it in to the dark, drip, drip, drip, drop after drop I watch as they fall in to nothingness,
I feel alone, sad, helpless as I see my life drip away...

 

[Veng]

I sit atop the mountain, I watch the trees, the clouds, the wind blowing across the open fields below, I see peace, I see serenity, I see grace and beauty like never be for.
I wish to be one with the world to be like a tree, to just be, to feel the warmth embrace of the sun, to feel the cooling caress of the wind, to have my roots dig deep to become strong, to be unmovable..

 

[Veng]

I live to eat.
I live to sleep.
I live to work.
I live to breath.
I live to bleed.
I live to dream.
I live for others.
I live for all things human.
I live for all things but my self.

WHY DO I LIVE????

 

[Veng]

I feel my self falling, falling deep into the hole of despair. I hit bottom with a thud,
it's hard to breath, to move, to see, I look up for the hope of day light, I see the light, I have hope, I have hope for someone to help for someone to hear my cries.
Time goes by, with that time the light that brought me hope is gone, I try climbing, crawling, reaching for that hope..
My hole has no light, has no hope, my hole is no longer a hole, it's my tomb.
For ever buried in dirt in the blackness of my soul..

 

[Veng]

My pain hurts, it hurts me as it does others
My pain should be my own, no one should pay for that pain...it is mine and mine alone.
To share it is to share despair, sorrow, sadness, hopelessness, grief, hatred,
My paint must be for me and me alone, alone I will bare it, feel it, live with it and die with it...

 

[Veng]

In God we trust in Hell we live.
In Hell we feel, we fight, we hope, we pray, we reach for the light.
The same light we reached for in life will be there in death.
there forever out of reach, in Hell we live in Hell like in life, we are forever reaching for the light..

 

[Veng]

Pain
Can pain be released threw more pain?
If I hurt more will i hurt less?
Like fighting fire with fire, can i fight pain with pain??

 

[Veng]

The cold.

I feel the water flowing past my feet, rising to my legs.
I breath in the cool night air.
I feel the water rising to my legs, my knees, my waist.
I feel the cold from the water and from the night air.
The cold hits my chest, from the outside the water pounds the cold in to me, from the inside my lungs fill with cold air.
I look up and see the moon looking down at me, its light fading as I slip deeper into the cold embrace of the water.
my lungs fill with water, my eye close as I feel my life fading away.
The cold brings the warm embrace of Death.

 

[Veng]

I see your pain, i see your tears, i see your sorrow, I see you walking, I see you screaming for help..
I wish I could help, to extend my hand, to grab on and pull you to safety.
like you I cant, I cant reach out, I cant grab hold, I cant help, for my own self is trapped, like you with you and alone like you trapped we are alone

 

[Veng]

Do you not see it? Do you not see the shadow hovering above me? do you not see my pain? do you not see my tears? my sadness? my despair?
Why cant you see??? How cant you see me?