just need to vent (may not be suitable for all)

[Bigman2232]

So last night I went out to the bars with 3 friends to celebrate the 19th birthday of one of them. It's the middle of finals right now and it was a monday night so it was absolutely dead. We hit up two different places and had lots to drink and I had a relatively good time.

However I came to some realizations as well as found out about a situation that actually really pisses me off (and it probably shouldn't).

I am a self professed "protector". I was raised to watch out for people and have been the "man of the house" since I was 9. I'm bigger than 90% of people I meet and I'm good at keeping calm in somewhat hectic situations. So I naturally watch out for my friends and I make sure they don't do anything stupid and that nothing happens to them. I've always done it and I've always been especially protective of female friends, since I've always looked after my younger sister and my mom.

Well last night one of the girls ran into a guy she had had a threesome with last year and was really embarrassed. Luckily he didn't see her and left very soon after. I found out that she regretted it and was very drunk at the time it happened. I don't know why but it really pisses me off.

I know that people are adults and that they will make their own choices and mistakes, but I also know the difference between making a bad decision and possibly being taken advantage of. It really angers me that a guy would take advantage of the situation like that and I think it angers me more that one of her other friends didn't watch out for her and at least make sure she was thinking enough to make a choice.

Drunk girls love me. I guess I just become a big cuddly bear and they like being able to hang off of me without me dropping them. I've probably had pretty good chances to get a kiss out of it or make a move I otherwise wouldn't get, but I never have. I just can't. Everything I've been taught makes my brain say no and to just make sure she gets home safe, no matter how much I want something.

So why am I so angered by something that really has nothing to do with me?

 

[jameslyons]

I don't think there's anything wrong with being upset when people are taken advantage of, it's commendable really. But while your friend was drunk, isn't there a good possibility that the other people were also drunk?

What's more, a threesome is not necessarily an example of abuse--it's just a sexual activity that isn't that common. But the issue is taking care of friends-it sounds like you do a good job, so yay for you! :biggrin:

 

[Bigman2232]

I don't think there's anything wrong with being upset when people are taken advantage of, it's commendable really. But while your friend was drunk, isn't there a good possibility that the other people were also drunk?

What's more, a threesome is not necessarily an example of abuse--it's just a sexual activity that isn't that common. But the issue is taking care of friends-it sounds like you do a good job, so yay for you! :biggrin:

It's not so much of the fact that it was a threesome, because I'd feel the same if it was just the two people. Yes they were all drunk but it's the fact that she has the personality that she often does things drunk that she wouldn't do otherwise. The guy knew it and still pressed the issue.

And while others may have been drunk I don't see that as a good enough excuse to not watch out for the other people you're with.

This really is just my problem. I hold myself to a certain code and I often find that others do not hold themselves to one that is as high as mine.