Just over a year ago she left..

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by BeautifulTragedy, Oct 30, 2009.

  1. she left a yr ago. gone for ever. she would never come again. i would never feel her cuddles, or here her voice (apart from watching the dvd from our last holiday over and over and over and over again, i really hope dvds dont die...

    sometimes i feel so alone =( even though i have my gorgeous daughter and husband by my side, i just feel so alone, or maybe its just now, i found out recently that im preg. again, and it just brought back memories. i remeber with my first child, the first moment and instant i found out i was preg. i ran to my mum i jumped on her and hugged her and didnt let her go and we just couldnt stop hugging and then wen she found out why she nearly killed me, but then calmed down.. (bit young) but to this day i laugh and remeber how much we laughed that day... ahh and now im sitting here thinking why isnt she here to share it all ove again with me??

    why did she have to leave? i dont see the necesscity behind it i really dont?! im reading a book called "No time to say goodbye - surviving the suicide of a loved one" i highly recomend it.. but every person that is mentioned has depression, or an illness, or tough backrounds, familys etc etc etc. she really had no troubles at all.. so even though the book has emptionally helped me.. it has made me question even more... WHY> ??

    I dont know.. its scary but it is what it is and i will for ever miss her and for ever love her, and never ever forget her.

    Sorry to bore you all, but i felt it relieveing to post up here =) cheers
  2. boo

    boo Well-Known Member

    I understand your loss for i still grieve the loss of my love. And its been 3 years now. I hope you will find the strength to carry on somehow.
  3. i hope so too, i mean as stupid as it sounds.. life must go on... but the pain and whole that they have left, just gets so painfull sometimes.. it just doesnt make sense..

    i think no matter how long has passed for us it still feels as though it was yesterday .. im not sure though but for me that show i feel :(
  4. boo

    boo Well-Known Member

    Yes, i still think of her alot, perhaps too much. My dreams sometime play cruel jokes on me. I sometime dream about her and when my eyes open the pain is unreal.