Just saying hello

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by AdrianR, May 18, 2014.

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  1. AdrianR

    AdrianR Member

    Hi all, my name is Adrian from Cape Town, South Africa. I'm a 25 year old guy studying at the moment. Been suffering from major depressive disorder for the last 3 years or so and have been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. I've come to your forum just to try and make sense of how my life can be worthwhile again, maybe, perhaps, I don't know.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi AdrianR nice to meet you There are many people with Aspergers that have such high end positons they do. I forget her name but she is the head of Agriculture and humanity to animals she has Aspergers and is brilliant and never let her illness stand in her way She uses her special outlook in life to help others hun so you can have anything you want find something you love and go after it ok
     
  3. shania

    shania Well-Known Member

    Temple Grandin?

    Hello and welcome to the forum, Adrian :)
     
  4. Butterfly

    Butterfly Pokémon Master Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    Hello Adrian and welcome to SF :)
     
  5. AdrianR

    AdrianR Member

    Thank you very much for the welcomes :). I don't love anything anymore, I tried and tried to find something but came up with nothing. I have no love for the stuff that used to make me tick either :(. That's why I'm here, I see no more point to anything. I also truly and wholly love someone (a girl) whom I can never be with, not because she's married or anything, but because she doesn't even want the slightest thing to do with me. This, combined with all the other cumulative failures over the last 20 years has finally broken my spirit for good :(.
     
  6. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    do things for sake of doing things?
    even if it is just little things, breaks a bit of routine and negativity.
    take up a new hobby? something you maybe never done, i mean. so you don't get past associations?

    also, welcome
     
  7. AdrianR

    AdrianR Member

    I'm so depressed already, I don't even have the energy or drive to try anything anymore. I used to have many hobbies, different things. But, there comes a time when your hobbies or passions don't get you anywhere and you've got to do something that makes you economically an asset to someone, like job-skills type of thing. My obscure hobbies weren't going to get me anywhere and they also don't fit into a regular pigeonhole of typical jobs. But, I do regret listening to other people, and I should have followed my passions in spite of their negativity. But alas, I didn't, and now I'm totally screwed up, feeling totally dead inside.
     
  8. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    hmm, no i meant just for you, not necessarily a job thing or something to greatly benefit from but you're saying no to that

    little things to break routines
     
  9. NickA8326

    NickA8326 Active Member

    Hi =) and welcome! That's got to be tough if you're really living in South Africa. I have Asperger's syndrome too, but only one of my parents had it, so now I have like half-Asperger's syndrome than one of my parents do because of genes, and it could be part of the reason that I don't have many friends, but I do take advantage of my social misfortions by enjoying my alone time. I still did my hobbies even before I knew which one was going to be what my profession was, and I still do them today, I don't have very many, but I still play video games, and I will for the rest of my life because I love them so much that they are my secondary/side passion, I'll never loose that feeling for them. I hope that you realize that avoiding hobbies just because they are not your profession/job, is like avoiding going outside or having a girlfriend or going on dates with her because that is not your profession/job and does not give you money. Just doesn't make any sense to avoid what you love in life like that, no one lives like that except for miserable people like my parents ended up because they didn't ever do anything that they enjoyed, I actually had my mom tell me that she wished that she did what I do instead of always be unhappy, instead of doing things because other people tell her to do them all her life.
     
  10. AdrianR

    AdrianR Member

    Thanks Nick, scaryforest. Yeah, I get what you're saying, except for the girlfriend part, because I've never had one. The thing is, my hobbies were never good enough for anyone to accept, people would always say "Why are you wasting time on something so stupid?". So many people don't even know what to say to me so they just say "What the hell is wrong with you? You're just so abnormal.". That happened to me at school always. School is where all my troubles started, and I've never come right since. My entire life everything I've ever wanted for myself had to come at a price. It's hard to put into words, but, it's like the feeling you get when you've pulled out all the stops to get something you've always wanted, shown more determination than ever before, and then people all turn against you and say, "there, are you happy now? You've got what you wanted, so go, take it now, it seems you would throw your own friends under a bus to get what you want". The guilt is unbearable. Everything I want is always achieved at a cost to someone else somehow. I just can't live with this anymore.
     
  11. NickA8326

    NickA8326 Active Member

    I went through something similar, I was always, and still am, and will forever be, an outcast, and my family would directly tell me that they don't care and I'm wasting my time, and my hobbies will never get me anywhere. Yes, it is a rule in nature that everything is usually at a cost to something else, weather it's your movements crushing and killing microscopic organisms, to you eating food that is at the price of ending another life form's life. Think for a moment, there's all the great people on this earth and all the beautiful animals continuously kill other life forms to eat in order to survive, compete and upset other competing life forms in order to have shelter or out sell their competing company in order for their offspring, and themselves to survive and enjoy life. It is designed in nature to be this way, you should embrace, and enjoy this concept, for nature is beautiful, and everyone takes something away from some other living thing at a "price" as you say.
     
  12. LostInMyDaydreams

    LostInMyDaydreams Well-Known Member

    Hello & Welcome to SF Adrian. :hug:
     
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