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Just so sad all the time.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by mlxjaded, Mar 28, 2011.

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  1. mlxjaded

    mlxjaded Well-Known Member

    I am seriously never happy anymore and I don't know why.
    Before, I'd always be more angry than sad and be kind of aggressive but now I feel even too weak for that.
    All I want to do is sit in bed all day and sleep + cry.

    Tonight, I was looking through a really old photo album that I haven't seen in years. I was looking at pictures of parents when they were younger and their wedding photos and I just starting crying.
    The looked so happy and healthy but now everything is just the opposite and I hate it.

    I'm crying right now just thinking about it again.
    I don't know why but I really do feel responsible for my parents not-wellbeing.
    I've been nothing but a burden on them.
  2. twc

    twc Well-Known Member

    I can relate. Everything can be a little too much at times. I feel like a burden to a lot of people in my life. I have to beware, though, of the tendency to blame myself for how other people live their lives, which I don't have any real control over. We all have to live our own lives, and no one else can do it.

    Also, looking at old pictures can really turn on the waterworks. It's easy to get overwhelmed by nostalgia and "what if" scenarios. It's a black hole. Don't go back there too much, stay in the present and think about the future. Hope this helps.
  3. mlxjaded

    mlxjaded Well-Known Member

    Everything really can be a little too much at time, you're right.
    I'm not suicidal or anything, though. I've come to the realization that I am way more scared of death than I am of the future- that's another story, though, as that also keeps me up almost every night.

    I'm really just trying to calm myself down.
    I was crying hysterically a few moments ago.
    I just cannot explain why I always feel so sad.
  4. twc

    twc Well-Known Member

    Well sometimes it's a relief to cry, isn't it? You can feel, you are still kicking. It's ok not to know why you are sad...just that you are. Feelings are real, even if they don't last forever.
  5. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    do you want to talk about what is going on with your parents more?
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