Just to let it all out...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Sakura, Jun 4, 2007.

  1. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    Well today hasn't been a completely terrible day. I'm coping a lot better than I was say just yesterday, when I had completely hit rock bottom =_=

    It was so bad...I couldn't even think, I was in so much mental and emotional pain. But once again my friends, internet ones both here, and at another forum...(because I can't seem to connect with people in real life :rolleyes:)...helped pull me through ^^

    Though right now I'm still feeling a bit dissociative, though I'm hoping that this will also pass soon ^^
  2. RainbowChaser

    RainbowChaser Well-Known Member

  3. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    Thanks :hug:

  4. danni

    danni Chat Buddy

    awww well sis were always here for you good and bad ones *hugs*
  5. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    Thanks Danni and Sammie :hug:

    Ahhh...nightime always seems to be the worst times for me. During the day, the thoughts...those always-there-never-want-to-leave-me-alone thoughts of death, suicide, and finally finding peace are there...but they are soooo much stronger at night =_=

    I feel so useless...and hopeless...and worthless right now...why do I even bother trying...there isn't really any hope...nothing will or can truly change...

    One day I'm finally going to get up the courage to do it...dammit it...why can't I just do it now! >.<

    There isn't anyone or anything that can stop me...I'm just living a lie as it is right now anyways. I smile and laugh with people...but inside my heart is broken, bleeding, and I'm crying with the silent pain...

    I just want it all to go away...leave me alone you damn thoughts...let me live my life in peace without you...let me be happy for once, like I used to be when I was very young...before my life went all to fucking hell...before the fucking bastard...ah fucking shit! >.<


    Leave me alone you fucking stupid thoughts! Just let me be in peace...just leave me alone! Dammit! Just let me be!!

    Why am I such a loser, and a failure...why can't I do anything right...why does everything I do, or touch just crumple away into nothingness...why can't I make anyone happy...why do I continue to disappoint everyone I know...god...I just want to be happy again...I just want the thoughts, feelings, hurt, and pain to go away...please...please...
  6. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    God I just want to die...why won't you just let me die...please...no one would miss me...I'm useless and a failure...no one needs a useless, worthless, stupid failure around...just let me die...please...I want to die so much right now...please...
  7. danni

    danni Chat Buddy

    *big gaint hug*