Just want some hugs

Innocent Forever

Go as long as you can. And then take another step.
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#1
Feeling really under the weather - have been only for the past couple of days which I'm grateful for. And just want some sympathy and hugs.
My boss was really nice about taking off work tomorrow. when I spoke to her she told me not to come in the way I sound. My other boss I texted that I have a replacement.
Didn't sleep last night. Hopefully will sleep tonight.
When I was drinking tap water was throwing it up immediately, that and gook.
Hopefully will wake up tomorrow feeling awesome. Right now I'm just feeling so under the weather and just want people to care. Thanks all of you! Take care of yourself. You're awesome and special. And worth it.
 
#13
I’m so sorry you’re feeling that way, friend. I just said a prayer for you, and I hope that God will surround you with His comfort, strength, and peace. Hope you’ll feel better soon. Sending hugs & prayers your way!
 

Petal

SF dreamer
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#14
I care. I am sorry things are so stressful for you right now and hope things improve (huggles) You are amazing. x
 

Innocent Forever

Go as long as you can. And then take another step.
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#15
Thanks all! You're the bestest.
Completely not dealing at the moment.
Just have to get through the moment, one moment at a time, right?
I really would love some people to just come and hold me right now, and promise me it'll pass.
I wrote out in my journal what I was thinking, wrote it out in order that can photocopy it. Have an appointment tomorrow that will either be the last therapy app with this person, or it won't. Gonna look at the photocopier now and printer, hopefully it's working. It's scary for me to do this. Especially as it could anyways be the last appointment so like, I'll be giving someone a piece and she won't even do anything with it.... I'm just pretty scared of where my head's taking me at the moment. The only way I have to get some calm is painkillers. I don't remember exactly when the last time I used them were but it's been nearly 4 weeks. Not so sure that staying away is the best idea if this is where it takes me to, but if I'm honest, the only reason I ever got involved with them was coz' of being here, so not sure what causes what. Can't untangle the threads that are tangles together in my head but don't need to. I kinda feel nothing. Like, just that. Nothing. I don't feel anything at all. It's weird.
This probably makes no sense anymore :)
Take care. You're worth it. Always.
 

nobodyknows71

For a Phoenix to rise, it must first burn.
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#16
Hi.

It will be four weeks tomorrow. You can make it. I know you can!
And if I'm right, if you use, you'll be beating yourself up about it. So you may as well just NOT use.

Therapy is very daunting.
Ending therapy is daunting. (Take it from me I know the feeling)
That last session is kind of weird though right? It's like, do I bear my soul to you and then just leave?
I know you're situation is different, but I can relate.

Look at it this way, if you give her the paper and it doesn't work out, you know for sure she's not for you. BUT if you give her the paper, it COULD lead you down a whole new path with her.

If I could come and hold you I'd be there in a flash. I'd hug you tight and tell you it WILL pass. Because it WILL.

I'll be thinking of you tonight and tomorrow.

Take care of you

Love and hugs x
 

Innocent Forever

Go as long as you can. And then take another step.
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#17
Thanks S. That means a lot to me.
I copied it to give to her. That's what was thinking. Also that, then she knows what's going on. She always says she doesn't know what I mean, that I'm not explaining myself. And it's true, because I only say what I know, which isn't very much. But here, even though what I wrote doesn't say anything, it does capture what I mean. So yeah.
I'd love you to come here.
Take care. You're special.
 

nobodyknows71

For a Phoenix to rise, it must first burn.
Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#18
Thanks S. That means a lot to me.
I copied it to give to her. That's what was thinking. Also that, then she knows what's going on. She always says she doesn't know what I mean, that I'm not explaining myself. And it's true, because I only say what I know, which isn't very much. But here, even though what I wrote doesn't say anything, it does capture what I mean. So yeah.
I'd love you to come here.
Take care. You're special.
Hey, I'm glad you're ready for tomorrow. I wish you all the luck in the world and hope that it goes how you want it too.
Sending you every positive vibe I can.
Sleep well

Love and hugs x
 

Innocent Forever

Go as long as you can. And then take another step.
Chat Pro
SF Supporter
#20
Okay, I'm just gonna scream.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Everything is hurting so so much right now.
Therapy was good. Didn't get to give her what I wrote, but it was okay, she got the picture.
I hate this. Hate being here. It's kinda a combination. Of all that using was masking. Combine that with withdrawal. Suicide definitely seems like a really good idea at the moment. Not gonna write about that here. It's not for this board. Just tired. Drained. Confused. Hate being here. Wish someone would come and hold me and promise me it'll get better and that it'll be okay. My knowledge doesn't help me at the moment. Don't know. It somewhat does. For I'm still here. So, I'm tired. It's been a long day and my head's not being a pretty place to live in. I wish it would oblige me and just be calm. It doesn't want to. It didn't ask me what I want.
Take care all.
 

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