just want to end it...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by orpheus, Dec 24, 2009.

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  1. orpheus

    orpheus Member

    i'm 15 years old. i've been seriously depressed for probably about 6 months. i haven't told anyone about being suicidal, not even my therapist. i know that's not a good thing but i couldn't bring it up. i've only attempted once but stopped. (only took about 10 pills and then realized how stupid i was being) but the feelings came back. i don't enjoy anything i used to, i feel like there's nowhere to turn. i don't feel like talking to my parents because they only make me feel worse. i know they don't mean to, but they do.
    i don't know what to do anymore. i don't know if there is anything that's actually worth my living for. i know people will hurt if i kill myself which is basically the only reason i'm still breathing.
  2. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Well first off, welcome to SF. It seems that you feel very alone with your problems and pain. Yeah this type of stuff is certainly not easy to talk about to others. And not something you just go up to your friends and blurt out.

    But you'll see that here you can talk freely about what your feeling and experiencing. That so many others will understand exactly. You dont have to be alone with this anymore.

    But you still need to talk to your therapist too. He/she can help you with meds if necessary and steer you in the direction of other resources that can help. How you ever considered a support group? Another great place to talk to other people that are or have been exactly where you are now. And a wonderful chance to make a few friends that can help you when you need real support. There are crisis lines you can call when the feelings become too much to deal with. There are a lot of resources still available to you.

    So please, keep posting. Tell us what you can so that the members here can help you through this rough spot you're at. You may not see it or believe it right now. But you are so young and have so much life still ahead of you. You havent even had the chance to experience being out on your own, being independent of your parents rules and choices for you. Please keep holding on and keep posting.
  3. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    At 15 I was feeling the same way.
    If help won't come to you though, you have to try to go to it.

    Please feel free to talk to us about your problems and how you are feeling.
    We will do our best to support eachother!
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hi and welcome to the forum.. I agree with Itmahanh that you should be honest with your therapist..They need to know all in order to put together a plan to help teach you coping skills..You are very young and probably feel your life is going nowhere.. Give it time..A support group definitely sounds like a good idea for you.. You can open up and talk to people your age..You also have alot of members here who will show you support..Keep posting.. When your new it takes a little time to start getting replies..Try to hold onto those positive thoughts.. When a negative thought tries to wiggle it's way in push it aside and think aboutone of the positive ones..Take Care!!
  5. bubblin girl

    bubblin girl Well-Known Member

    welcome to SF
    I was feeling the same in your age...and i agree with the others...I advice to tell your parants & therapist.
    take care :hug:
  6. orpheus

    orpheus Member

    Still here, going to call someone at some point today.
  7. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Glad to see you're still here and that you are going to try getting some help. Let us know how it goes. And please post here when ever you need to. It does help too.
  8. orpheus

    orpheus Member

    didn't call anyone yesterday. but i think i'm going to go to the hospital once i can get out of the house. (once people are asleep)
  9. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    I wish i had half the sense you do when i was your age, that is assuming that you are going to the hospital to get help and if you are you should tell your parents cuz they will find out anyway, and at least then they can know of your pain. Its a good decision on your part to seek help.

    Oh and welcom to the forum, im not the best on advice but if im on im always willing to just bs with ya if that would help.
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