keep stuffing up

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by JBird, Sep 7, 2007.

  1. JBird

    JBird Well-Known Member

    My best friend is 19 and her bf 22. Her bf had to move away 9 months ago to get treatment for his depression and other things, she hasn't seen him since then.

    A month ago he was discharged and has been staying at his rented home near the hospital. He kept saying to her that he couldn't see her because he's still unstable yet he goes out to see other women and gets drunk all the time and parties! So she sits at home feeling insecure thinking she's vile because her own fiance doesn't want to see her! I keep telling her to tell him how she feels but she cant because as soon as she mentions that she's feeling low about the situation her bf starts getting suicidal and sends her on a guilt trip and ends up drunk and back in hospital!

    Anyway, i finally got her book tickets to go to his house to see him. He agrees to it but then last night she came told me that her bf was staying an hour away from his house for the night and might not make it back to see her! She went out with family to distract herself and when her bf came online i laid into him, im sick to death of him treating her like crap, i told him exactly how she felt and why she couldn't tell him.

    He's obviously told her what i said and last night she was telling me that i've ruined her life and that i need to stay out of her business...

    If i wasn't in this situation where im at hospital and i dont know if im still going to be here in a week then i woldn't have acted like that! The fact is that im struggling here and no one cares, she never asks how im doing unless i get an infection, apart from that its all about her and its not fair. When i want to be comforted about my illness i feel like im milking it for attention or something which isn't the case! I have no 'real' friends and no family. All i have is social services, the doctors and my friends on MSN. SS, the doctors and nurses dont comfort you or promise everythings going to be ok because they cant, they know there's only a 30-40% chance of me being ok. I exploded and took all my feelings out on her bf, it was only a 10 minute conversation but he's not used to it.

    Anyway, she's gone to see him today and im left without her. The only friend i've ever had and i ruined it. This is why i dont like friendship, its complicated and it hurts you. I wasn't made to have friends or family so why do i bother?!
  2. Ignored

    Ignored Staff Alumni

    It's probably easier for her to put the blame on to you rather than face up to the possibility that her boyfriend is an arse and her relationship is crap. If she's a friend worth having she'll come around... if not, then she's really not worth the effort.