Well.. sorry for wasting your time then. Wasn't my intention at all. I want to talk, i wish i could.. i try.. but yeah. You are right. It is and i am a waste of time. I won't post any more threads.. problem solved.
Sorry but I don't think you're trying at all. You just don't sound like someone who is genuinely in trouble.
If you are, then for Heaven's sake seek help. Talk to people here or go to your parents or try to find a psychiatrist who's a decent human being but don't come on here, post and subsequently say
"Oh, it doesn't matter anymore anyway. I'll see ya.". It's inappropiate. And in my opinion not something someone would do who, like I said, is genuinely in trouble. But I could be wrong... Maybe. And if I am, then like I said, seek help. Suicidal feelings are there to get rid of, not to covet.