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Knives and Guitar Cables

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by lost__, Sep 4, 2008.

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  1. lost__

    lost__ New Member

    Well, I had been getting drunk for four months
    everyday i would hit the bottle
    6-9+ drinks a day
    with at least a gram of marijuana passing through my lungs
    b4 that...
    dysfunctional cheating girlfriend
    ignorant parents

    the day that it happened i received a voicemail
    "please help me... i was walking down the street and someone kidnapped me... please please help... i dont know where i am... *crying*... please"
    of course i freak
    call all of my friends
    make sure they are all ok
    but my ex did not pick up
    call her again...
    call her again...
    so i call 911
    a cop shows up and sends an officer over there while calling her number
    the best part
    its a prank phone call
    she didnt think i heard her
    she didnt know the consequences

    i missed 2 hours of work and several heartbeats

    later that day i drank a 6 pack and a bottle of southern comfort to forget what happened that morning
    but i go out for a smoke
    and the basement floods
    i try to clean it up
    but my stepmother just screams that this is my fault
    so i leave

    she calls my best friend
    in my drunken state
    we argue for blocks
    he finally calms me down
    and brings me home
    where not one...
    but two "parents" chew me out for flooding the basement

    i've had enough

    its time to cut
    but the knife isnt sharp enough

    < Mod edit Hazel: Method >

    i don't know what happened after that
    i remember the ambulance and some of the hospital
    but i woke up in a psych ward in a different town 2 days later

    i spent the next 2 weeks there...
    transfered to a different hospital because it was in the middle of upgrading
    spent 1 week there
    the last 2 days in which i was forced to stay because my mother was trying to protect me from myself

    i dont know how i feel now
    i just found out that i was kept there for no reason by my mother
    it hurts to know that im not trusted
    not even with myself
    i dont want to kill myself
    but i dont want to be here either way
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 4, 2008
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Hi lost. Welcome to SF. Sorry to hear that you're suffering so much. I agree that you're ex-girlfriend played a really bad prank on you by saying that she had been kidnapped. I'm sure she regrets doing that after hearing about your suicide attempt. I hope that you didn't do too much damage < Mod edit Hazel: referring to Method >. Your mom sounds like she really cares about you, since she's keeping you from harming yourself again. It's for your own good. Please, don't hurt yourself again. Talk about why you're feeling so bad. We're here to help. :hug:
    Last edited: Sep 4, 2008
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