So basically i have suffered from depression, frequent panic disorder and post traumatic stress disorder for my whole adult life and most of my adolescent life. I'm male...born in 84'. Recently times have gotten nothing but worse. When i was 23 i was working at a local precious metals refinery when it was robbed at gun point, I had no other choice but to fire my weapon and unforgeable one of the men robbing us died as a result of my actions. I was looking in his eyes when he passed and still to this day, years later i think about how i ended this young mans life. The judge ruled the shooting was justified on my part and that i would not face criminal charges, but that didnt change things. I still felt horrible for killing another human, he had a family just like me. But it was me or him that was going to die that day. Soon nthere after i began to use drugs, namely Xanax (Alprazolam) and black tar heroin. After a SIGNIFICANT financial loss on my part, my family is falling apart. I truly want nothing then a clean slate and to end my life. I dont want to remember the man who's life i took, and i dont want to continue to use drugs. <Mod Edit, WildCherry: Methods> This is not a "spur of the moment" thing i have thought about this for years. My question is has the method been proven un-painful?